My brain has ceased all normal operations. I am so frustrated with my inability to even THINK in coherent sentences that I can not imagine what it must be like to be around me at the moment. Thankfully I leave for vacation soon. Is someone working on my caffeine IV?
I finally got my dress altered for the wedding that is 2 weeks from tomorrow. Well not so much “altered” as “straps shortened” but it’ll do. I think it looks nice. For purple. ;D My friend Michele’s mom did it for me which was awesome since it was also free! Woo hoo! She also had this great idea for steaming out some of the wrinkles on the front… It’s called a dressmaker’s ham. After I stopped looking at her like an alien had popped up on her left shoulder she kindly explained it to me (Curved! Like the dress! Lies flat while ironing!) AND let me borrow it. Such a nice woman.
I really think they should bring back Home Economics in school. Really, that pains the feminist in me to say, but come on here people. I can sew a (crooked) hem in some pants if I absolutely have to and replace buttons. That’s about it. I’ve got the culinary bits down but know people who didn’t even know you could make rice on the stove! Something is seriously lacking in our generation y’all. I’m just saying. Basic skills. That’s all I’m asking for.
There is a shiny new white Mac Powerbook calling my name in the window of the Apple store near my office. Just think of all the blogging I could do from that baby!
Also, I fell in love with the cutest blonde lab puppy this morning. When I woke TheBoy up to announce that I MUST. HAVE. THE. PUPPY! He laughed and promptly went back to sleep. The NERVE y’all! It was love at first sight! Sniff, sniff. You think if I just showed up one day with this itty bitty ball of a puppy he’d be able to stay mad that long? We’d make a pretty darn adorable group, the puppy, the cat and me!
Okay, I’m going to apologize IN ADVANCE for my blog silence. I’m leaving tonight and will be gone for 9 whole days! So looking forward to it. 9 whole days where my toughest decisions will be whether I should go for a run and then go lay out by the pool? Or maybe go for a little rafting trip and then find some shade by the river and read a book? The possibilities are endless!
Miss me!
Friday, July 28, 2006
Thursday, July 27, 2006
Something for Carrie
1) My ex is ... Just someone I used to know.
2) Maybe I should ... Stop being lazy and just do the stupid ironing when I do the laundry so it doesn’t take 3 and ½ hours! Work on really paying down my debt. Buy some new running shoes. And a bike.
3) I love ... TheBoy. My girls. TheCat. My mom for understanding me no matter what. Summer days and long summer nights. Beer.
4) I don't understand ... People without filters. Jealousy. Traffic.
5) I lost ... My mind? :) My temper? My car on the street last weekend?
6) People say that I'm ... I don’t know what people say I am. Anyone care to share? Be nice!
I would say I am… independent, sensitive, friendly, athletic, nerdy, shy… A contradiction maybe?
7) People are ... Fascinating. Frustrating.
8) Love is .... A long, intricate, intimate dance. Not for the faint of heart.
9) Somewhere, someone is ... Laughing, crying, waking, sleeping, running, standing still, being born or dying. It’s what is the most beautiful about life.
10) I always ... Match my underthings to my outfits, wear sunscreen on my face, wash my face first in the shower, screen my phone calls (sorry!), hold back what I really want to say for fear of hurting someone or sounding vulnerable.
11) Forever is ... A really, REALLY long time!
12) I never want to ... Regret not doing something when I had the chance.
13) I think the current President is ... Only going to ruin my days for 17 more months or so.
14) When I wake up in the morning I... Hit the snooze button, cuddle with TheCat, mentally plan my day, stretch, start my whole morning routine. That’s a whole post in and of itself.
15) When life gives you lemons... Make a lemon drop!
16) My past ... Made me who I am and for that I can not be sorry. I just wish it would stay more in the past.
17) I get annoyed with ... things I can not control.
18) I wish ... Life would slow down. I could figure out what I want to do. Everyone would just get along.
19) Dogs are..... Family! Running partners, companions, a desire.
20) Tomorrow I am ... Working, having lunch with Angie and driving 4 hours (Lord willing if traffic cooperates) to Bella Vista to start my vacation.
21) I have low tolerance for ... Ignorance. Apathy. Insensitivity.
22) If I had a million dollars I would ... Pay off my debt. Pay off my parents home loan. Put a down payment on a house for myself.
2) Maybe I should ... Stop being lazy and just do the stupid ironing when I do the laundry so it doesn’t take 3 and ½ hours! Work on really paying down my debt. Buy some new running shoes. And a bike.
3) I love ... TheBoy. My girls. TheCat. My mom for understanding me no matter what. Summer days and long summer nights. Beer.
4) I don't understand ... People without filters. Jealousy. Traffic.
5) I lost ... My mind? :) My temper? My car on the street last weekend?
6) People say that I'm ... I don’t know what people say I am. Anyone care to share? Be nice!
I would say I am… independent, sensitive, friendly, athletic, nerdy, shy… A contradiction maybe?
7) People are ... Fascinating. Frustrating.
8) Love is .... A long, intricate, intimate dance. Not for the faint of heart.
9) Somewhere, someone is ... Laughing, crying, waking, sleeping, running, standing still, being born or dying. It’s what is the most beautiful about life.
10) I always ... Match my underthings to my outfits, wear sunscreen on my face, wash my face first in the shower, screen my phone calls (sorry!), hold back what I really want to say for fear of hurting someone or sounding vulnerable.
11) Forever is ... A really, REALLY long time!
12) I never want to ... Regret not doing something when I had the chance.
13) I think the current President is ... Only going to ruin my days for 17 more months or so.
14) When I wake up in the morning I... Hit the snooze button, cuddle with TheCat, mentally plan my day, stretch, start my whole morning routine. That’s a whole post in and of itself.
15) When life gives you lemons... Make a lemon drop!
16) My past ... Made me who I am and for that I can not be sorry. I just wish it would stay more in the past.
17) I get annoyed with ... things I can not control.
18) I wish ... Life would slow down. I could figure out what I want to do. Everyone would just get along.
19) Dogs are..... Family! Running partners, companions, a desire.
20) Tomorrow I am ... Working, having lunch with Angie and driving 4 hours (Lord willing if traffic cooperates) to Bella Vista to start my vacation.
21) I have low tolerance for ... Ignorance. Apathy. Insensitivity.
22) If I had a million dollars I would ... Pay off my debt. Pay off my parents home loan. Put a down payment on a house for myself.
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
Sticky
Do you believe in love
and that we were meant to be?
and that we were meant to be?
Two words can free us,
so repeat them after me"I do."*
It’s a dangerous game, when you start drawing lines in the sand. How far will you go in a relationship, how much of yourself will you give, nay, should you be expected to give, before you can rightfully demand something in return.
The truth is, had I known five years ago that TheBoy and I would still be hesitating over the big “I do” question I probably wouldn’t have gotten as involved as I did. Having said that, I’m truly glad that I didn’t know. I wouldn’t trade one minute of the time we’ve shared, the connection we feel or the love that is clearly visible between us. Why would I trade in the perfect relationship for a not-so-perfect one that might include a ring?
And yet? I never dreamed I’d spend the rest of my life alone. Because make no mistake… I am alone. Single. In the eyes of the state, of my family… In a secret place in my heart I feel… alone. I’ve heard arguments on both sides. Marriage changes nothing. Marriage changes everything. I’m tired of the arguments. I feel like I can’t even remember what I’ve been arguing for.
I remember, vaguely, that it used to be very important to me not to live with a boy before we were engaged. Well, when TheBoy and I moved in together I honestly thought with the way things had been going that we were headed in that direction. We’d only been together for a few months sure but… it was just RIGHT. I was just so sure he was The One. I didn’t hesitate.
Now I’m holding on to this notion that we shouldn’t buy a house together until we’re married, or at least engaged. Real Estate is my profession, I KNOW that this goes wrong. It feels wrong, the one time we came close I couldn’t bring myself to do it at the last minute. And yet? Now? We’re stuck.
Do we buy houses next door to each other? Across town? Live separately after almost 5 years? Does one of us sacrifice financial security and rent from the other for the rest of our lives? And you know what the worst thing is? I am doing this to us. I’ve made us stuck here in this place. And that I could, theoretically, get us un-stuck.
The ever-burning question is should I?**
*From the song Tennessee by Sugarland on their album Twice the Speed of Life. If you even remotely like country music, buy this album.
**Rhetorical question.
so repeat them after me"I do."*
It’s a dangerous game, when you start drawing lines in the sand. How far will you go in a relationship, how much of yourself will you give, nay, should you be expected to give, before you can rightfully demand something in return.
The truth is, had I known five years ago that TheBoy and I would still be hesitating over the big “I do” question I probably wouldn’t have gotten as involved as I did. Having said that, I’m truly glad that I didn’t know. I wouldn’t trade one minute of the time we’ve shared, the connection we feel or the love that is clearly visible between us. Why would I trade in the perfect relationship for a not-so-perfect one that might include a ring?
And yet? I never dreamed I’d spend the rest of my life alone. Because make no mistake… I am alone. Single. In the eyes of the state, of my family… In a secret place in my heart I feel… alone. I’ve heard arguments on both sides. Marriage changes nothing. Marriage changes everything. I’m tired of the arguments. I feel like I can’t even remember what I’ve been arguing for.
I remember, vaguely, that it used to be very important to me not to live with a boy before we were engaged. Well, when TheBoy and I moved in together I honestly thought with the way things had been going that we were headed in that direction. We’d only been together for a few months sure but… it was just RIGHT. I was just so sure he was The One. I didn’t hesitate.
Now I’m holding on to this notion that we shouldn’t buy a house together until we’re married, or at least engaged. Real Estate is my profession, I KNOW that this goes wrong. It feels wrong, the one time we came close I couldn’t bring myself to do it at the last minute. And yet? Now? We’re stuck.
Do we buy houses next door to each other? Across town? Live separately after almost 5 years? Does one of us sacrifice financial security and rent from the other for the rest of our lives? And you know what the worst thing is? I am doing this to us. I’ve made us stuck here in this place. And that I could, theoretically, get us un-stuck.
The ever-burning question is should I?**
*From the song Tennessee by Sugarland on their album Twice the Speed of Life. If you even remotely like country music, buy this album.
**Rhetorical question.
Tuesday, July 25, 2006
I'm sorry... So sorry...
I feel like I spend most of my time on this here blog lately apologizing for my silence. It’s not that I’m trying to make myself sound important y’all I’m just THAT busy! But you know what comes along with being THAT busy? Being THAT tired!
Last weekend the girls and I headed over the hill to Capitola Village where we rented a beach house for the weekend to celebrate Angie’s Bachelorette weekend. It was fairly low key, lots of laying around on the beach, some games, a few beverages of the alcoholic variety and one cake shaped like a certain part of the male anatomy. *ahem*
Good times y’all. Also, good planning as it was right smack dab in the middle of a huge heat wave at home so while it was in the high 80’s and near perfect with an ocean breeze at the coast, it was over 100 degrees and sweltering at home. Eeek. I came home on Sunday to 118 degrees in my apartment. So not my idea of fun.
Anyway, I hope the bride had a good time! It’s less than three weeks until the big day! I can’t wait – it’s going to be so fun. I’ve been looking forward to this day for what seems like my whole life. ;^D
*****
TheBoy and I are leaving on Friday for 9 days in Sunriver, Oregon with his family. Should be very relaxing, with lots of bike riding and swimming and such. Unfortunately, TheBoy has what we’re fairly certain is a cracked rib so we’re going to have to limit the horseback riding and river rafting but still… 9 days with absolutely nothing more pressing to decide than whether I should go swimming then bike riding or vice versa. I can not wait. And we might try to sneak in a day at the lake on our way home!
*****
This is probably borderline TMI (or hell – it’s probably VERY TMI) but I’m starting to notice that lately strange things seem to get me… “in the mood” if you will. Songs on the radio, certain foods, passing smells, memories, dreams. Totally random things at random times will occur to me and... Well, y’all get the picture.
Anyone else notice this? Is it because I’m getting older?
Last weekend the girls and I headed over the hill to Capitola Village where we rented a beach house for the weekend to celebrate Angie’s Bachelorette weekend. It was fairly low key, lots of laying around on the beach, some games, a few beverages of the alcoholic variety and one cake shaped like a certain part of the male anatomy. *ahem*
Good times y’all. Also, good planning as it was right smack dab in the middle of a huge heat wave at home so while it was in the high 80’s and near perfect with an ocean breeze at the coast, it was over 100 degrees and sweltering at home. Eeek. I came home on Sunday to 118 degrees in my apartment. So not my idea of fun.
Anyway, I hope the bride had a good time! It’s less than three weeks until the big day! I can’t wait – it’s going to be so fun. I’ve been looking forward to this day for what seems like my whole life. ;^D
*****
TheBoy and I are leaving on Friday for 9 days in Sunriver, Oregon with his family. Should be very relaxing, with lots of bike riding and swimming and such. Unfortunately, TheBoy has what we’re fairly certain is a cracked rib so we’re going to have to limit the horseback riding and river rafting but still… 9 days with absolutely nothing more pressing to decide than whether I should go swimming then bike riding or vice versa. I can not wait. And we might try to sneak in a day at the lake on our way home!
*****
This is probably borderline TMI (or hell – it’s probably VERY TMI) but I’m starting to notice that lately strange things seem to get me… “in the mood” if you will. Songs on the radio, certain foods, passing smells, memories, dreams. Totally random things at random times will occur to me and... Well, y’all get the picture.
Anyone else notice this? Is it because I’m getting older?
Thursday, July 20, 2006
On Engagement
Look at me! Two posts with pictures in as many days!! I'm on a roll y'all... Practically a brand new woman.
Michele's and John's engagement party was this weekend. And seriously it was the most fun party I've been to probably EVER. The setting, the people, the PRIVATE DISCO?!?! Yeah. You can read more about it here.
Blogger doesn't like me and isn't letting me upload photos so my pictures are here.
**********
Four years ago (roughly - June of 2002) TheBoy and I went to Napa for the day to celebrate our first anniversary and to do some wine tasting. It was a momentous occasion for me in two ways. 1) I had to finally acknowledge that MAYBE this was not, in fact, a summer fling as we had lasted a year AND had just signed a lease on an apartment together. Even though we'd been "unofficially" living together for 5 months already. And 2) I was strictly a beer drinking kind of girl before TheBoy came along, with some hard stuff thrown in for good measure. I knew where I was from y'all... None of this high brow wine snobbery for me!
Anyway, we drove up for the day, with the top down, blasting tunes and getting sunburned. If I remember correctly, it was almost 100 degrees that Saturday. TheBoy took me to all of his favorite wineries and we tasted and tasted and tasted to our little hearts content. I was more than a little tipsy! We shared a picnic lunch under a shaded tree outside a winery where his cousin worked (works?) and I let him steal a few kisses in front of God and everybody. I was so embarrassed but I was so in love (and also maybe a little drunk) so I didn't care.
We also, of course, bought some wine. At one winery I absolutely fell in love with this particular bottle of wine. It was by far the best wine we'd tasted all day. And by far the most expensive. I wavered and hemmed and hawed over whether or not I should buy a bottle. In the end I joined their wine club* so I could get a discount and bought one bottle. We joked about saving it for our wedding night or other special occasion. And because I'm a girl and because it was our anniversary weekend and it seemed fitting that is how I've always thought of that wine. Every time I looked at it sitting there in our wine rack covered in dust, every time I packed it gingerly in paper when we moved, I'd think back to that first anniversary and look forward, longingly, to the night we would open that bottle.
A few weeks ago when I returned from Maui I was putting the bottles of pineapple sparkling wine that I had brought back into the wine rack when I felt my hand brush against something sticky. Sure enough there was a dark red stain across the back of my wrist. I searched for the culprit and when I realized which bottle was leaking I gingerly pulled it out, wiped it off, set it on the table and cried.
Last night we opened that bottle and poured it down the sink.** Ironic? Or maybe a sign? The wine I thought we'd use to celebrate our wedding didn't even last long enough for us to get engaged.
*I remained a member for a LONG time - until I lost my job several years later.
**Actually, TheBoy poured it down the sink after I went to bed, I started crying at the mere mention of dumping it. Seemed too... symbolic? Wrong.
Michele's and John's engagement party was this weekend. And seriously it was the most fun party I've been to probably EVER. The setting, the people, the PRIVATE DISCO?!?! Yeah. You can read more about it here.
Blogger doesn't like me and isn't letting me upload photos so my pictures are here.
**********
Four years ago (roughly - June of 2002) TheBoy and I went to Napa for the day to celebrate our first anniversary and to do some wine tasting. It was a momentous occasion for me in two ways. 1) I had to finally acknowledge that MAYBE this was not, in fact, a summer fling as we had lasted a year AND had just signed a lease on an apartment together. Even though we'd been "unofficially" living together for 5 months already. And 2) I was strictly a beer drinking kind of girl before TheBoy came along, with some hard stuff thrown in for good measure. I knew where I was from y'all... None of this high brow wine snobbery for me!
Anyway, we drove up for the day, with the top down, blasting tunes and getting sunburned. If I remember correctly, it was almost 100 degrees that Saturday. TheBoy took me to all of his favorite wineries and we tasted and tasted and tasted to our little hearts content. I was more than a little tipsy! We shared a picnic lunch under a shaded tree outside a winery where his cousin worked (works?) and I let him steal a few kisses in front of God and everybody. I was so embarrassed but I was so in love (and also maybe a little drunk) so I didn't care.
We also, of course, bought some wine. At one winery I absolutely fell in love with this particular bottle of wine. It was by far the best wine we'd tasted all day. And by far the most expensive. I wavered and hemmed and hawed over whether or not I should buy a bottle. In the end I joined their wine club* so I could get a discount and bought one bottle. We joked about saving it for our wedding night or other special occasion. And because I'm a girl and because it was our anniversary weekend and it seemed fitting that is how I've always thought of that wine. Every time I looked at it sitting there in our wine rack covered in dust, every time I packed it gingerly in paper when we moved, I'd think back to that first anniversary and look forward, longingly, to the night we would open that bottle.
A few weeks ago when I returned from Maui I was putting the bottles of pineapple sparkling wine that I had brought back into the wine rack when I felt my hand brush against something sticky. Sure enough there was a dark red stain across the back of my wrist. I searched for the culprit and when I realized which bottle was leaking I gingerly pulled it out, wiped it off, set it on the table and cried.
Last night we opened that bottle and poured it down the sink.** Ironic? Or maybe a sign? The wine I thought we'd use to celebrate our wedding didn't even last long enough for us to get engaged.
*I remained a member for a LONG time - until I lost my job several years later.
**Actually, TheBoy poured it down the sink after I went to bed, I started crying at the mere mention of dumping it. Seemed too... symbolic? Wrong.
Wednesday, July 19, 2006
Maui Pics (Finally!)
Looking at these pictures makes me realize what a LONG and STRESSFUL 15 days it has been since I've been home. I'm already looking forward to the 29th when TheBoy and I leave for 9 days of nothing but relaxing and swimming and generally tomfoolery with his family in Sunriver. I could really use a vacation y'all!
Here are Liz and I at the Rehersal Dinner which was by the pool in one of the condo complexes where the bride and her family were staying. Of course it was right by the beach so there was a spectacular sunset and a crystal clear view of Molokini.
Here are Liz and I at the Rehersal Dinner which was by the pool in one of the condo complexes where the bride and her family were staying. Of course it was right by the beach so there was a spectacular sunset and a crystal clear view of Molokini.
Here we are at the wedding which was held at the most beautiful plantation house. We are standing just behind the place where the bride and groom said their vows. The wedding itself was truly touching - at one point when the groom went to say his vows he turned to the bride and grabbed both of her hands... at that point I lost the battle with the tears I was keeping at bay and I was dabbing at my mascara for the rest of the short but sweet ceremony.
The day after the wedding we spent the day playing around in Lahaina, shopping in all the nifty shops, checking out the Banyan Tree, the old Court House, the Chinese Museum, eating lunch at Kimo's and just generally being tourists. Afterwards we drove down to Kanapaali to do some snorkeling at Black Rock and see the cliff divers at sunset. Here we are having dinner at the old hotel there (I've forgotten the name) in downtown Lahaina at the end of that very long but fun day.
Anyway, those are just a few of my favorites... The whole shebang of them are posted here.
Thursday, July 13, 2006
Random
I gave up my parking permit for the garage behind my building because 1) I couldn’t justify the expensive given all the flipping doctor bills I’ve got these days and 2) I was feeling pretty lazy since there is FREE street parking in the residential area a few streets away. I mean really, I’m in good shape, I should be able to walk right? I don’t want to end up one of those people who can’t walk 4 blocks without being winded.
Anyway, THAT was not the point of this story. The point was that on my way walking in to the office this morning I passed the cutest kitty sunning himself on the sidewalk. So what did I do, being the kitty lover that I am? I just HAD to pet that precious little cat. And he was SO CUTE y’all. He sat up and started purring and rubbing his little cheeks on my hand. SO. CUTE.
But then? When I started to leave? He followed me! So I had to turn around and go back to, what I presumed was, his house and explain to him that he had to stay there. And as I walked away, here comes the cat. Seriously, we did this little number about 3 or 4 more times before the cat finally got bored of me and wandered away in search of some grass to munch.
THIS is why I have an indoor cat y’all. Because my cat? He’s maybe not the smartest fur ball to ever have his ears scratched if you know what I mean. He’d take off after the first friendly stranger that looked like they had food in their pockets. I’m just saying.
**********
I have renewed my faith in humanity.
I generally get my prescriptions filled at the gigantic chain pharmacy across the street from my office. I went to the mom and pop owned local pharmacy for years but they were so far out of the way and this one was more convenient and yes I feel guilty about it why do you ask? Anyway, moving on. The pharmacy is convenient I will give them that, but their customer service skills leave a lot to be desired. More than once I’ve arrived several hours after the promised delivery date of my prescriptions only to be told that they’re still not ready and wouldn’t I mind coming back.
The other day I went in to get my migraine meds refilled, and true to form I had left it to the last possible day so I was preparing myself for a long wait. When I got there the only customer service person (poor frazzled girl) was helping a guy in a wheel chair pick out gloves. I’m a patient person, I don’t mind, in fact I was impressed that she was taking the time to help the guy. I mean clearly he couldn’t reach the gloves, which were on the top shelf, on his own. No one in the line seemed to be grumbling. It was a nice thing to do.
But then all of a sudden you could almost sense the change in her. She was anxious to be away and back behind the counter. I’m not sure if she was overly conscious of the other customers or what. I tried to smile encouragingly at her the one time she looked over and caught my eye but it didn’t seem to help. All of a sudden she simply piled various boxes of gloves in the guy’s wheelchair and instructed him to get back in line when he had made his choice.
Now y’all. The guy could not operate the wheelchair due to the placement of the boxes in his lap. You could see the embarrassment on his face. I was 4 seconds away from going over there and trying to help him, even though I don’t know the first thing about the benefits of latex gloves over whatever the other kind were, when all of a sudden I heard the woman behind me say “Good Lord.” I looked back and she sort of half smiled at me and pushed her way out of line and went over to the guy to help him.
Turns out she’s a caregiver for the elderly (the gloves the man was trying to purchase were for his own in-house caregivers) and she carefully collected the piles of boxes out of his wheelchair and gave him some pointers on which gloves SHE prefers and helped him make his decision based on size and price. Once they were both back in line I turned and whispered a thank you to her, indicating my own wish to help and ignorance in the subject of gloves. The three of us joked about the customer service and discussed the weather, the Giants and their children (hers) and grandchildren (his).
Sometimes the kindness of a stranger will affect more than just the recipient of the good deed. I believe everyone in that line left the store with a smile on their face that afternoon.
**********
I didn’t end up going to the gym OR doing any ironing OR uploading any Hawaii photos last night. The last one was probably pretty obvious. In fact I didn’t do anything productive at all!
What I DID do was sit my lazy butt on the couch and watch 4 episodes of So You Think You Can Dance back to back thanks to TiVo.
Oh yes I did.
Anyway, THAT was not the point of this story. The point was that on my way walking in to the office this morning I passed the cutest kitty sunning himself on the sidewalk. So what did I do, being the kitty lover that I am? I just HAD to pet that precious little cat. And he was SO CUTE y’all. He sat up and started purring and rubbing his little cheeks on my hand. SO. CUTE.
But then? When I started to leave? He followed me! So I had to turn around and go back to, what I presumed was, his house and explain to him that he had to stay there. And as I walked away, here comes the cat. Seriously, we did this little number about 3 or 4 more times before the cat finally got bored of me and wandered away in search of some grass to munch.
THIS is why I have an indoor cat y’all. Because my cat? He’s maybe not the smartest fur ball to ever have his ears scratched if you know what I mean. He’d take off after the first friendly stranger that looked like they had food in their pockets. I’m just saying.
**********
I have renewed my faith in humanity.
I generally get my prescriptions filled at the gigantic chain pharmacy across the street from my office. I went to the mom and pop owned local pharmacy for years but they were so far out of the way and this one was more convenient and yes I feel guilty about it why do you ask? Anyway, moving on. The pharmacy is convenient I will give them that, but their customer service skills leave a lot to be desired. More than once I’ve arrived several hours after the promised delivery date of my prescriptions only to be told that they’re still not ready and wouldn’t I mind coming back.
The other day I went in to get my migraine meds refilled, and true to form I had left it to the last possible day so I was preparing myself for a long wait. When I got there the only customer service person (poor frazzled girl) was helping a guy in a wheel chair pick out gloves. I’m a patient person, I don’t mind, in fact I was impressed that she was taking the time to help the guy. I mean clearly he couldn’t reach the gloves, which were on the top shelf, on his own. No one in the line seemed to be grumbling. It was a nice thing to do.
But then all of a sudden you could almost sense the change in her. She was anxious to be away and back behind the counter. I’m not sure if she was overly conscious of the other customers or what. I tried to smile encouragingly at her the one time she looked over and caught my eye but it didn’t seem to help. All of a sudden she simply piled various boxes of gloves in the guy’s wheelchair and instructed him to get back in line when he had made his choice.
Now y’all. The guy could not operate the wheelchair due to the placement of the boxes in his lap. You could see the embarrassment on his face. I was 4 seconds away from going over there and trying to help him, even though I don’t know the first thing about the benefits of latex gloves over whatever the other kind were, when all of a sudden I heard the woman behind me say “Good Lord.” I looked back and she sort of half smiled at me and pushed her way out of line and went over to the guy to help him.
Turns out she’s a caregiver for the elderly (the gloves the man was trying to purchase were for his own in-house caregivers) and she carefully collected the piles of boxes out of his wheelchair and gave him some pointers on which gloves SHE prefers and helped him make his decision based on size and price. Once they were both back in line I turned and whispered a thank you to her, indicating my own wish to help and ignorance in the subject of gloves. The three of us joked about the customer service and discussed the weather, the Giants and their children (hers) and grandchildren (his).
Sometimes the kindness of a stranger will affect more than just the recipient of the good deed. I believe everyone in that line left the store with a smile on their face that afternoon.
**********
I didn’t end up going to the gym OR doing any ironing OR uploading any Hawaii photos last night. The last one was probably pretty obvious. In fact I didn’t do anything productive at all!
What I DID do was sit my lazy butt on the couch and watch 4 episodes of So You Think You Can Dance back to back thanks to TiVo.
Oh yes I did.
Wednesday, July 12, 2006
If Shawn gets away with it... :)
Sorry guys I DID NOT sleep last night! So you guys get the half ass post today. :) Hope it's entertaining anyway...
10 years ago... I was working full time at Papyrus at Stanford Mall, spending inordinate amounts of time alternating between the beach and whichever friend’s house had a pool and a keg. I had entered my rebellious phase. People were “worried about me”. I had just ended my Junior year of high school with the highest GPA and the toughest course load ever and I was looking forward to an easy Senior year. My two closest friends had abandoned me for a rival school, I had decided not to cheer (cheer had been my LIFE prior to that), I had a falling out with my youth pastor and pretty much left church, and I thought I was in love. I was 17.
5 years ago... I had dropped out of college to pursue a career in the booming Silicon Valley real estate market. I was working with two excellent top producing realtors whom I loved. I was living in a condo they had purchased for me to live in. I had recently started dating TheBoy and I was sure he was THE ONE. Little did I know that 2 short months down the road some radical terrorists were going to fly planes into buildings and alter the course of the world.
1 year ago... Gee… 1 year ago looked an awful lot like today! I was working at the same job, living in the same apartment… Hmm… Oh! Last year this time I was training for the San Francisco Marathon. Also, 1 year ago TheBoy and I were actively looking into purchasing a home together. In fact I believe this time last year was the Aptos House from here and here.
Yesterday... I worked all day. I fed a friend’s cats on my lunch break. TheBoy and I watched the All Star game and had dinner at Chili’s, where we ran into Michele. Afterwards we went home and watched Cinderella Man which I made it ALMOST all the way through before passing out on the couch. It’s so exciting to be me sometimes.
Today... I will work all day and feed my friend’s cats on my lunch break. After work I might go to the gym since my knee hasn’t been hurting me too much so far this morning (knocks on wood). I also REALLY NEED to do the ironing before it topples off of the chair I have it perched in and suffocates my cat. I’m just saying. You know what? I take it back. TODAY it’s so exciting to be me.
Tomorrow... OH! Tomorrow gets better! Tomorrow I work all day (this adult thing is NOT all it’s cracked up to be) but then I get to go shopping with Michele and Liz at the Banana Republic outlet for something for Michele to wear to her Engagement photo session on Friday! See! That’s not horribly boring and sad right? Thank God y’all! I was about to go curl up under my desk in the fetal position.
5 snacks I enjoy... Cheese, Peanut butter filled pretzels, Cheese, Carrots and Spicy Hummus, did I mention Cheese?
5 songs I know all the words to... only 5?
Breathless by the Corrs
Release Me by Wilson Phillips (or anything on that first album if I’m being honest)
Baby Got Back by Sir Mix Alot (don’t judge – you know y’all are singing it right now!)
Pour Some Sugar On Me by Def Leopard (my car’s theme song)
Hit Me Baby One More Time by Britney Spears (no excuses)
5 regrets... I regret the way I treated this guy I dated back in high school, Jimmy, he was sweet to me and deserved better. I regret staying so long with my ex Gabor when clearly we were wrong for each other, I was just so afraid that I would never find anyone else. I regret all the time I spent trying to be good enough for other people, it wasn’t worth it in the end. I am constantly regretting the things I say, if I could have a rewind and erase button I’d be a happy girl! I reget a lot of things surrounding my relationship with Jim.
5 television shows I watch weekly... Ha! Umm… Well assuming it was winter and the regular programing was in season I might be able to watch the shows I record on TiVo with some regularity, but I’m not promising weekly! It’s more likely that I’ll be watching 2 or 3 weeks worth in one sitting! But here you go!
The OC (that pains me to admit but I DID grow up with 90210!)
House
American Idol (you can take the girl out of the performance…)
Family Guy
Simpsons
5 things I would do with $100,000,000...
Buy a house
Pay off my parent’s house
Invest
Travel
Buy investment real estate
5 locations I would love to run away to...
Kauai
Italy (I’ve never been!)
Greece (ditto!)
Texas
My parent’s house
5 things I hate doing...
Ironing!
Talking about my feelings
Confronting people – about anything – even if I’m in the right
Crying in public – which I do A LOT
Going to the doctor – there are sick people there!
5 things I like doing...
Hanging out with my friends!
Reading
Running / working out / being active
Swimming / wake boarding / being at the lake
Cooking
5 things I would never wear...
Nylons with open toed shoes
Tevas (or other sandals) with socks
Colored tights or nylons
Tapered ankle or flood style pants
Shoulder pads a la football players or 80’s power suits
5 recently seen movies I like...
Cinderella Man (or at least what I saw)
Lord of War (MUCH better than what I expected)
Crash
Ummm… I don’t watch that many movies y’all!
But DON’T see Club Dread! Whatever you do – just take my word for it!
5 famous people I'd like to meet... Err… I’m not a big celebrity hound. Unless shaking some sense into Britney Spears counts?
5 biggest joys of the moment...
Celebrating with Michele and John at their Engagement Party this weekend.
Spending the weekend with the girls in Capitola next weekend for Angie’s Bachelorette Party.
TheBoy and I are spending two weekends in a row together! (Lame I know – but we’ve been spending a lot of time this summer apart due to various wedding and family commitments)
We just celebrated our FIVE YEAR ANNIVERARY! I think that deserves a cookie or something.
And not to sound cheesy or anything but for those of you that know me I’m just really taking joy in the (relative) good health of my loved ones.
10 years ago... I was working full time at Papyrus at Stanford Mall, spending inordinate amounts of time alternating between the beach and whichever friend’s house had a pool and a keg. I had entered my rebellious phase. People were “worried about me”. I had just ended my Junior year of high school with the highest GPA and the toughest course load ever and I was looking forward to an easy Senior year. My two closest friends had abandoned me for a rival school, I had decided not to cheer (cheer had been my LIFE prior to that), I had a falling out with my youth pastor and pretty much left church, and I thought I was in love. I was 17.
5 years ago... I had dropped out of college to pursue a career in the booming Silicon Valley real estate market. I was working with two excellent top producing realtors whom I loved. I was living in a condo they had purchased for me to live in. I had recently started dating TheBoy and I was sure he was THE ONE. Little did I know that 2 short months down the road some radical terrorists were going to fly planes into buildings and alter the course of the world.
1 year ago... Gee… 1 year ago looked an awful lot like today! I was working at the same job, living in the same apartment… Hmm… Oh! Last year this time I was training for the San Francisco Marathon. Also, 1 year ago TheBoy and I were actively looking into purchasing a home together. In fact I believe this time last year was the Aptos House from here and here.
Yesterday... I worked all day. I fed a friend’s cats on my lunch break. TheBoy and I watched the All Star game and had dinner at Chili’s, where we ran into Michele. Afterwards we went home and watched Cinderella Man which I made it ALMOST all the way through before passing out on the couch. It’s so exciting to be me sometimes.
Today... I will work all day and feed my friend’s cats on my lunch break. After work I might go to the gym since my knee hasn’t been hurting me too much so far this morning (knocks on wood). I also REALLY NEED to do the ironing before it topples off of the chair I have it perched in and suffocates my cat. I’m just saying. You know what? I take it back. TODAY it’s so exciting to be me.
Tomorrow... OH! Tomorrow gets better! Tomorrow I work all day (this adult thing is NOT all it’s cracked up to be) but then I get to go shopping with Michele and Liz at the Banana Republic outlet for something for Michele to wear to her Engagement photo session on Friday! See! That’s not horribly boring and sad right? Thank God y’all! I was about to go curl up under my desk in the fetal position.
5 snacks I enjoy... Cheese, Peanut butter filled pretzels, Cheese, Carrots and Spicy Hummus, did I mention Cheese?
5 songs I know all the words to... only 5?
Breathless by the Corrs
Release Me by Wilson Phillips (or anything on that first album if I’m being honest)
Baby Got Back by Sir Mix Alot (don’t judge – you know y’all are singing it right now!)
Pour Some Sugar On Me by Def Leopard (my car’s theme song)
Hit Me Baby One More Time by Britney Spears (no excuses)
5 regrets... I regret the way I treated this guy I dated back in high school, Jimmy, he was sweet to me and deserved better. I regret staying so long with my ex Gabor when clearly we were wrong for each other, I was just so afraid that I would never find anyone else. I regret all the time I spent trying to be good enough for other people, it wasn’t worth it in the end. I am constantly regretting the things I say, if I could have a rewind and erase button I’d be a happy girl! I reget a lot of things surrounding my relationship with Jim.
5 television shows I watch weekly... Ha! Umm… Well assuming it was winter and the regular programing was in season I might be able to watch the shows I record on TiVo with some regularity, but I’m not promising weekly! It’s more likely that I’ll be watching 2 or 3 weeks worth in one sitting! But here you go!
The OC (that pains me to admit but I DID grow up with 90210!)
House
American Idol (you can take the girl out of the performance…)
Family Guy
Simpsons
5 things I would do with $100,000,000...
Buy a house
Pay off my parent’s house
Invest
Travel
Buy investment real estate
5 locations I would love to run away to...
Kauai
Italy (I’ve never been!)
Greece (ditto!)
Texas
My parent’s house
5 things I hate doing...
Ironing!
Talking about my feelings
Confronting people – about anything – even if I’m in the right
Crying in public – which I do A LOT
Going to the doctor – there are sick people there!
5 things I like doing...
Hanging out with my friends!
Reading
Running / working out / being active
Swimming / wake boarding / being at the lake
Cooking
5 things I would never wear...
Nylons with open toed shoes
Tevas (or other sandals) with socks
Colored tights or nylons
Tapered ankle or flood style pants
Shoulder pads a la football players or 80’s power suits
5 recently seen movies I like...
Cinderella Man (or at least what I saw)
Lord of War (MUCH better than what I expected)
Crash
Ummm… I don’t watch that many movies y’all!
But DON’T see Club Dread! Whatever you do – just take my word for it!
5 famous people I'd like to meet... Err… I’m not a big celebrity hound. Unless shaking some sense into Britney Spears counts?
5 biggest joys of the moment...
Celebrating with Michele and John at their Engagement Party this weekend.
Spending the weekend with the girls in Capitola next weekend for Angie’s Bachelorette Party.
TheBoy and I are spending two weekends in a row together! (Lame I know – but we’ve been spending a lot of time this summer apart due to various wedding and family commitments)
We just celebrated our FIVE YEAR ANNIVERARY! I think that deserves a cookie or something.
And not to sound cheesy or anything but for those of you that know me I’m just really taking joy in the (relative) good health of my loved ones.
Monday, July 10, 2006
Tail Spin
You know most days I sort of wander through my life and I think, man I have this grown-up thing down pat. You know? Good job, maybe even career (though not what I would have chosen for myself and if I don’t love it – I don’t hate it either and coming to work is enjoyable), tidy apartment, healthy cat, strong relationships with my boyfriend, my friends, my family…
And then something crops up and I think, who am I kidding?!?!? It’s amazing I even manage to feed myself! I am, of course, speaking of finances. I have always had a “just in case” account. You know… Some money put aside in case something happened and I needed a buffer. And you know what? Even when things were pretty bad and I was unemployed or underemployed I never used it. So this year when my friends started getting engaged and then several opportunities presented themselves to travel I thought I’d use the “just in case” money for that.
Because, really, can you think of a better reason to spend money than on celebrating with your closest friends?!?! But then you know what happened? Of course you know. Because it is Murphy’s Law, right? I got sick. Or rather, I got went hiking and developed some blood blisters, which got infected. Then I got some mosquito bites, which got infected. I had Staph, then another kind of bacteria and there were antibiotics and steroids and shots and pills and inexplicable knee pain and… Doctor bills.
Lots and lots and lots of bills from my Doctor. And the Doctor she referred me to for the infections. And the Doctor they jointly referred me to for the knee pain. Bills and more bills. And I thought, fine, no problem, it happens. Could be worse, right? And I’m finally getting better so at least I can joke about having my health right? At least 70% of it anyway…
But you know what I DON’T need right now? Car trouble. Like brakes that are going out in the back. And a driver’s side window motor thingy that won’t let me roll up my window if I roll it down so I have to open the door and grab on and pull it up while I push the button if I forget and roll it down. Or windshield wipers that I never got fixed last winter and then it stopped raining but you know it’s going to start raining again someday, as TheBoy reminds me, and I can’t put it off forever. And an oil light that keeps going on for some reason that has yet to be discovered, oh and speaking of oil, I’m due for an oil change.
*sigh*
Someone send wine?
And then something crops up and I think, who am I kidding?!?!? It’s amazing I even manage to feed myself! I am, of course, speaking of finances. I have always had a “just in case” account. You know… Some money put aside in case something happened and I needed a buffer. And you know what? Even when things were pretty bad and I was unemployed or underemployed I never used it. So this year when my friends started getting engaged and then several opportunities presented themselves to travel I thought I’d use the “just in case” money for that.
Because, really, can you think of a better reason to spend money than on celebrating with your closest friends?!?! But then you know what happened? Of course you know. Because it is Murphy’s Law, right? I got sick. Or rather, I got went hiking and developed some blood blisters, which got infected. Then I got some mosquito bites, which got infected. I had Staph, then another kind of bacteria and there were antibiotics and steroids and shots and pills and inexplicable knee pain and… Doctor bills.
Lots and lots and lots of bills from my Doctor. And the Doctor she referred me to for the infections. And the Doctor they jointly referred me to for the knee pain. Bills and more bills. And I thought, fine, no problem, it happens. Could be worse, right? And I’m finally getting better so at least I can joke about having my health right? At least 70% of it anyway…
But you know what I DON’T need right now? Car trouble. Like brakes that are going out in the back. And a driver’s side window motor thingy that won’t let me roll up my window if I roll it down so I have to open the door and grab on and pull it up while I push the button if I forget and roll it down. Or windshield wipers that I never got fixed last winter and then it stopped raining but you know it’s going to start raining again someday, as TheBoy reminds me, and I can’t put it off forever. And an oil light that keeps going on for some reason that has yet to be discovered, oh and speaking of oil, I’m due for an oil change.
*sigh*
Someone send wine?
Friday, July 07, 2006
Chivalry is dead? In Canada?
For our snorkeling trip out to Molokini and Turtle Town BFL and I had to get up at the obscenely early (for vacation anyway) hour of 5:30 am to toss on swim suits and cover ups and drive down to the marina for the boarding time of 6:30. The boat was a “catamaran”. I put catamaran in quotes because this thing wasn’t even equipped with sails so they were making no pretense of even remotely being able to sail. We motored out and we motored in, regardless of the heavy trade winds. But it LOOKED like a catamaran.
Because BFL and I are both somewhat anal retentive and I am a morning person we, of course, made it there plenty early and were among the first 3 or 4 groups of people to arrive. This was actually really cool because after we got ourselves all checked in, lost our shoes to the bucket (all the cruises are “barefoot” – I suspect because too many people have lost shoes overboard) and were actually ON THE BOAT, we managed to snag some pretty sweet seats at the front on a bench next to the trampolines.
Across from us was a large family of seven, mom, dad, grandma, grandpa, and three sons. On our bench was a newlywed couple and three of the cutest Canadian boys ever. As it was barely 7:00 in the morning there wasn’t much conversation amongst us at first as you can imagine. A few polite comments here and there, a few shared laughs at the Captain and crew’s lame jokes, that’s about it. We did learn that the boys next to us were not 21 by the grumbling complaints about not being able to drink, but over 18 because they were legal to drink in Canada (or Mexico, Europe… most of the free world really). Also that they were Canadian, figured that one out all on my own! It was early y’all – cut me some slack.
After snorkeling for a bit at Molokini we all headed back to the boat for the trip over to Turtle Town and more snorkeling. This is when the talking actually began. We learned that the boys were on their graduation trip after just finishing High School – making them JUST 18. They entertained us with stories of each other’s drunken mishaps and some of people back home. They were staying with one of the boy’s moms and they couldn’t believe she’d brought 8 PAIRS OF SHOES for a 2 week trip! I wisely kept quiet with this news as I had brought 4 pairs of shoes and purchased 1 pair there for a 6 day trip and that’s only because I didn’t bring my running shoes and I believe Liz brought 5 pairs and bought 1 pair there for a 10 day trip so… Yeah I guess men are never too young to be baffled by women’s shoe addictions!
After snorkeling at Turtle Town lunch was served and the booze service began for those of us, *ahem*, WELL OVER the legal drinking age state side thankyouverymuch. And there was more chatting with the people on our boat. One of the crew had locked himself out of his house and his roommate had moved out the day before so he was pretty worried that he wasn’t going to be able to get back in. I’m not sure why he told me that. People are just friendlier in the islands? He was cute so I didn’t mind terribly – plus he was the one handing out the booze! The newlyweds were an odd pair, husband was pretty darn cute but the wife… eh. BFL thought maybe she was an animal in the sack! You never know! She did have a pretty cute Southern accent and you KNOW what they say about us Southern girls!! ;)
After lunch we started heading back into the marina and at this point we notice that those trade winds everyone is always talking about? They are so not kidding around about those! It was crazy out there! The wind was gusting so hard and so fast hair and towels and swimsuit cover-ups were whipping around and stinging the skin and eyes. Every time we hit a wake a giant wall of water would come washing over onto the boat and drench every thing and everyone in its path. It was a rocking good time y’all! At one point they even stopped the boat to ask if any of us still sitting in the front wanted to move back… No way! Even someone’s grandma stayed up front!
I think it was around this point that one of our cute little Canadian boys left his seat on the tramp and came over to cower behind me on the bench. He actually said something like, “I’m just going to hide here behind you, can you block the wind?” Apparently chivalry in Canada is totally dead! I just laughed. His friends laughed. I told him that he was giving Canadian men a horribly bad reputation. He asked me not to hold it against them all. And then when a particularly nasty wave launched me practically into his lap it dawned on me that perhaps his anti-chivalry thing wasn’t such a bad move on his part after all!
Poor guy. I gave him a lot of crap, it was a LONG trip back to port, and well you know… I can be a bit sarcastic sometimes. And as soon as we made it into the marina his buddies started in with the giving him crap for flirting and some random kid I don’t think anyone knew joined in on the fun! At that point he finally introduced himself as Shawn (or Sean). I never did catch the other two kids’ names. Anyway, if he was flirting, I totally give him credit for trying it with a woman nearly 10 years his senior!
But really… Guys… Try the chivalry thing! Am I wrong ladies? I LOVE IT! But I am Southern so maybe it’s just a me thing?
Because BFL and I are both somewhat anal retentive and I am a morning person we, of course, made it there plenty early and were among the first 3 or 4 groups of people to arrive. This was actually really cool because after we got ourselves all checked in, lost our shoes to the bucket (all the cruises are “barefoot” – I suspect because too many people have lost shoes overboard) and were actually ON THE BOAT, we managed to snag some pretty sweet seats at the front on a bench next to the trampolines.
Across from us was a large family of seven, mom, dad, grandma, grandpa, and three sons. On our bench was a newlywed couple and three of the cutest Canadian boys ever. As it was barely 7:00 in the morning there wasn’t much conversation amongst us at first as you can imagine. A few polite comments here and there, a few shared laughs at the Captain and crew’s lame jokes, that’s about it. We did learn that the boys next to us were not 21 by the grumbling complaints about not being able to drink, but over 18 because they were legal to drink in Canada (or Mexico, Europe… most of the free world really). Also that they were Canadian, figured that one out all on my own! It was early y’all – cut me some slack.
After snorkeling for a bit at Molokini we all headed back to the boat for the trip over to Turtle Town and more snorkeling. This is when the talking actually began. We learned that the boys were on their graduation trip after just finishing High School – making them JUST 18. They entertained us with stories of each other’s drunken mishaps and some of people back home. They were staying with one of the boy’s moms and they couldn’t believe she’d brought 8 PAIRS OF SHOES for a 2 week trip! I wisely kept quiet with this news as I had brought 4 pairs of shoes and purchased 1 pair there for a 6 day trip and that’s only because I didn’t bring my running shoes and I believe Liz brought 5 pairs and bought 1 pair there for a 10 day trip so… Yeah I guess men are never too young to be baffled by women’s shoe addictions!
After snorkeling at Turtle Town lunch was served and the booze service began for those of us, *ahem*, WELL OVER the legal drinking age state side thankyouverymuch. And there was more chatting with the people on our boat. One of the crew had locked himself out of his house and his roommate had moved out the day before so he was pretty worried that he wasn’t going to be able to get back in. I’m not sure why he told me that. People are just friendlier in the islands? He was cute so I didn’t mind terribly – plus he was the one handing out the booze! The newlyweds were an odd pair, husband was pretty darn cute but the wife… eh. BFL thought maybe she was an animal in the sack! You never know! She did have a pretty cute Southern accent and you KNOW what they say about us Southern girls!! ;)
After lunch we started heading back into the marina and at this point we notice that those trade winds everyone is always talking about? They are so not kidding around about those! It was crazy out there! The wind was gusting so hard and so fast hair and towels and swimsuit cover-ups were whipping around and stinging the skin and eyes. Every time we hit a wake a giant wall of water would come washing over onto the boat and drench every thing and everyone in its path. It was a rocking good time y’all! At one point they even stopped the boat to ask if any of us still sitting in the front wanted to move back… No way! Even someone’s grandma stayed up front!
I think it was around this point that one of our cute little Canadian boys left his seat on the tramp and came over to cower behind me on the bench. He actually said something like, “I’m just going to hide here behind you, can you block the wind?” Apparently chivalry in Canada is totally dead! I just laughed. His friends laughed. I told him that he was giving Canadian men a horribly bad reputation. He asked me not to hold it against them all. And then when a particularly nasty wave launched me practically into his lap it dawned on me that perhaps his anti-chivalry thing wasn’t such a bad move on his part after all!
Poor guy. I gave him a lot of crap, it was a LONG trip back to port, and well you know… I can be a bit sarcastic sometimes. And as soon as we made it into the marina his buddies started in with the giving him crap for flirting and some random kid I don’t think anyone knew joined in on the fun! At that point he finally introduced himself as Shawn (or Sean). I never did catch the other two kids’ names. Anyway, if he was flirting, I totally give him credit for trying it with a woman nearly 10 years his senior!
But really… Guys… Try the chivalry thing! Am I wrong ladies? I LOVE IT! But I am Southern so maybe it’s just a me thing?
Thursday, July 06, 2006
Attack of the Turtle
One of the things BFL and I did in Maui was a snorkeling trip out to Molokini and Turtle Town.
Molokini is a big sunken volcanic crater just off Maui’s coast in between Maui and the island of Molokai. It is a bird sanctuary on the island and a marine preserve in the water so the snorkeling is phenomenal there. I’ve been once before in the winter and while we did see many, many wonderful and colorful fish on this trip I do have to say the last time in February was outstanding.
Turtle Town is really just a snorkel and dive spot just off the golf course in the Makena / Wailea, South Maui area. You can probably guess that it’s home to a lot of the giant Hawaiian Sea Turtles. When we got there almost immediately we saw two come up to the surface to breathe. In the water we only saw one. It’s a bit tricky because they do look like rocks so you’re basically swimming along thinking Rock? Turtle? Rock? Wait did that thing just move?
I’m happy to report that the Hawaiian Sea Turtles are no longer endangered. They used to be but they are making a come back and are now only protected. This is very good news. However, as our tour guide said, you still can’t touch them, ride on them, carve things into their shells or give them turtle nuggies. Nor should you want to. The last tour guide we had 4 years ago when we were there told us that they have a bacteria on their shells that can make humans very ill if we ingest it. Also, they carry all sorts of diseases. It was enough to keep this AR germaphobe away! Don’t touch the turtles – got it.
But. Four years ago? One of those, still endangered at that point (and highly diseased), turtles tried to touch me! I swear y’all. True story! I was swimming along minding my own business when I heard TheBoy make that “eh eh” noise so common to people trying to speak with a snorkel in their mouth and turned my head to see a turtle coming up for air. They are truly beautiful to look at when they are swimming. Also, I realized he was maybe coming right at me. And those suckers are faster than you think they would be. Or at least they are faster than my unwieldy ass is in too big rental flippers!
So here I am, doing the swimming equivalent of backpedaling in the water, and that peaceful turtle is just swimming on, intent on his goal. I suppose since the only reason that the turtles even bother coming to the surface is to breathe I can be a little forgiving here. I mean it’s not like he was just popping up for a look-see. But still. All I could think was “holy hell this diseased creature is going to touch me and I am going to be in TROUBLE!” Seriously. The whole way over to Turtle Town all we had heard was Don’t. Touch. The. Turtles.
Finally I just took of my mask because I was actually sucking salt water IN through the snorkel at that point and thought I was going to drown and managed to push myself far enough away so that the turtle came up for air maybe a foot and a half from my shoulder. TheBoy was busy taking pictures from underwater with our handy-dandy water proof camera* and was absolutely NO HELP to me and my dilemma. It felt like hours but I’m sure it has taken me longer to write out the story of this adventure that the whole thing lasted. Just as I was breathing a sigh of relief that I hadn’t been touched and was starting to wonder how far the bacteria, diseases and general germy-ness could travel in sea water I heard a shout from the boat behind me. “DON’T TOUCH THE TURTLE!”
I turned around and treading water with my mask in hand and in the most indignant voice I could muster I shouted back, “HE tried to touch ME!”
*Which, by the way, we STILL have not developed the film off of. Or, I do not know where the photos are. That’s the kind of tourist I am y’all.
Molokini is a big sunken volcanic crater just off Maui’s coast in between Maui and the island of Molokai. It is a bird sanctuary on the island and a marine preserve in the water so the snorkeling is phenomenal there. I’ve been once before in the winter and while we did see many, many wonderful and colorful fish on this trip I do have to say the last time in February was outstanding.
Turtle Town is really just a snorkel and dive spot just off the golf course in the Makena / Wailea, South Maui area. You can probably guess that it’s home to a lot of the giant Hawaiian Sea Turtles. When we got there almost immediately we saw two come up to the surface to breathe. In the water we only saw one. It’s a bit tricky because they do look like rocks so you’re basically swimming along thinking Rock? Turtle? Rock? Wait did that thing just move?
I’m happy to report that the Hawaiian Sea Turtles are no longer endangered. They used to be but they are making a come back and are now only protected. This is very good news. However, as our tour guide said, you still can’t touch them, ride on them, carve things into their shells or give them turtle nuggies. Nor should you want to. The last tour guide we had 4 years ago when we were there told us that they have a bacteria on their shells that can make humans very ill if we ingest it. Also, they carry all sorts of diseases. It was enough to keep this AR germaphobe away! Don’t touch the turtles – got it.
But. Four years ago? One of those, still endangered at that point (and highly diseased), turtles tried to touch me! I swear y’all. True story! I was swimming along minding my own business when I heard TheBoy make that “eh eh” noise so common to people trying to speak with a snorkel in their mouth and turned my head to see a turtle coming up for air. They are truly beautiful to look at when they are swimming. Also, I realized he was maybe coming right at me. And those suckers are faster than you think they would be. Or at least they are faster than my unwieldy ass is in too big rental flippers!
So here I am, doing the swimming equivalent of backpedaling in the water, and that peaceful turtle is just swimming on, intent on his goal. I suppose since the only reason that the turtles even bother coming to the surface is to breathe I can be a little forgiving here. I mean it’s not like he was just popping up for a look-see. But still. All I could think was “holy hell this diseased creature is going to touch me and I am going to be in TROUBLE!” Seriously. The whole way over to Turtle Town all we had heard was Don’t. Touch. The. Turtles.
Finally I just took of my mask because I was actually sucking salt water IN through the snorkel at that point and thought I was going to drown and managed to push myself far enough away so that the turtle came up for air maybe a foot and a half from my shoulder. TheBoy was busy taking pictures from underwater with our handy-dandy water proof camera* and was absolutely NO HELP to me and my dilemma. It felt like hours but I’m sure it has taken me longer to write out the story of this adventure that the whole thing lasted. Just as I was breathing a sigh of relief that I hadn’t been touched and was starting to wonder how far the bacteria, diseases and general germy-ness could travel in sea water I heard a shout from the boat behind me. “DON’T TOUCH THE TURTLE!”
I turned around and treading water with my mask in hand and in the most indignant voice I could muster I shouted back, “HE tried to touch ME!”
*Which, by the way, we STILL have not developed the film off of. Or, I do not know where the photos are. That’s the kind of tourist I am y’all.
Wednesday, July 05, 2006
Here today... Gone to Maui!
Pardon my blog silence for the past six days but I have been on the wonderful tropical island of Maui with BestFriend Liz. And let me tell you, this back to reality crap isn't all it's cracked up to be! When my alarm went off this morning at 7 am - which was really 4 am Maui time - I just about died.
But never fear... Coffee conquers all! And I have loads of stories and sadly few pictures to post (hopefully tonight - no promises), mountains of laundry and a TAN! Well okay fine. I have more freckles. But from a distance they LOOK almost like a TAN. So there. It's as close as I get y'all. Seriously.
Anyway, just a brief post to let you know I'm alive and well. BFL is off to Oahu (so sad really - let's feel sorry for her maybe?) and I'm home for three measly days before TheBoy and I fly to Oregon for my family reunion this weekend. Exciting. It's almost like I'm a jet-setter. Or something.
I hope you all had a wonderful 4th. I did get to see some fireworks from the window of the plane as I landed in San Francisco last night. Which means that SF does their fireworks show REALLY late because my flight got in EARLY at 11:05 pm. I'm just saying...
But never fear... Coffee conquers all! And I have loads of stories and sadly few pictures to post (hopefully tonight - no promises), mountains of laundry and a TAN! Well okay fine. I have more freckles. But from a distance they LOOK almost like a TAN. So there. It's as close as I get y'all. Seriously.
Anyway, just a brief post to let you know I'm alive and well. BFL is off to Oahu (so sad really - let's feel sorry for her maybe?) and I'm home for three measly days before TheBoy and I fly to Oregon for my family reunion this weekend. Exciting. It's almost like I'm a jet-setter. Or something.
I hope you all had a wonderful 4th. I did get to see some fireworks from the window of the plane as I landed in San Francisco last night. Which means that SF does their fireworks show REALLY late because my flight got in EARLY at 11:05 pm. I'm just saying...
Wednesday, June 28, 2006
Texas
Our house in Texas was off of something called a Rural Route. I can’t remember the numbers now but it was always fun to say “turn right off the freeway on to Rural Route such and such.” Cibolo is a small town. I was recently asked to point it out on a map only to discover that it didn’t even warrant a dot until you got to the blown up insert map of San Antonio and surrounding areas. Even then it was just the tiniest of dots. I think when I lived there it had between 600 and 700 people. I believe now they are up 1000+. Progress y’all! It’s funny because if you look at the demographics for my hometown there is almost no one there in my age group. Mass exodus.
There really is a Volunteer Fire Department. One of the Lieutenants lived next door to us. He was divorced also and had two children that stayed with him every weekend and all summer long. Their mother lived in “the City”, which in our case meant San Antonio. His son had Down Syndrome and was in a wheel chair, one of those motorized kinds. The daughter was spoiled – I have a feeling that her brother got most of the attention and so she acted out because of it. It must have been noticeable enough for me to notice it, and remember it, as a child.
I went to J. Frank Dobie, except then it was called an Intermediate School and housed 5th and 6th grades together. When I moved to California for the 7th grade they actually wanted to put me forward a grade. That’s the difference in the Texas public school system and the California public school system. Our school had stairs but no elevator. This is significant because I got thrown from my horse once because a bird flew under his stomach and it startled him. Because I was young and foolish, and also because I fancied myself quite a good rider, I wasn’t paying attention at the time and I didn’t have my feet properly in the stirrups. As a result when Chief bolted I came out of the saddle but my one boot was stuck so I was holding on desperately to the rear of the saddle trying to get my foot out of my boot (I was riding English) before I got kicked to death. I really screwed up my ankle when it came free and I fell (but I didn’t get trampled – yay for small miracles!) and I had to have crutches for several weeks. Stairs and crutches are an awful combination.
As I’ve mentioned before, the area I grew up in was mostly military. There were / are 3 Air Force bases in the area, Lackland, Randolph and Brooks, in addition to the Army’s Fort Sam Houston. My mom was working as a civilian at Fort Sam, her best friend (who lived just down the street from us) worked at Randolph AFB. Almost ALL of my friends were military brats like me, a few were locals – small town born and raised. Some had been there for generations.
In my class we had the preacher’s daughters from two different churches, the town mechanic’s son, the grocer’s kids, the Sheriff’s daughter (she was one of my “best” friends), assorted policeman’s and fireman’s kids, the dentist’s daughter and the doctor’s son (who were “going together”) and the guy who owned the Dairy Queen’s daughter. It was truly the epitome of small town life.
There really is a Volunteer Fire Department. One of the Lieutenants lived next door to us. He was divorced also and had two children that stayed with him every weekend and all summer long. Their mother lived in “the City”, which in our case meant San Antonio. His son had Down Syndrome and was in a wheel chair, one of those motorized kinds. The daughter was spoiled – I have a feeling that her brother got most of the attention and so she acted out because of it. It must have been noticeable enough for me to notice it, and remember it, as a child.
I went to J. Frank Dobie, except then it was called an Intermediate School and housed 5th and 6th grades together. When I moved to California for the 7th grade they actually wanted to put me forward a grade. That’s the difference in the Texas public school system and the California public school system. Our school had stairs but no elevator. This is significant because I got thrown from my horse once because a bird flew under his stomach and it startled him. Because I was young and foolish, and also because I fancied myself quite a good rider, I wasn’t paying attention at the time and I didn’t have my feet properly in the stirrups. As a result when Chief bolted I came out of the saddle but my one boot was stuck so I was holding on desperately to the rear of the saddle trying to get my foot out of my boot (I was riding English) before I got kicked to death. I really screwed up my ankle when it came free and I fell (but I didn’t get trampled – yay for small miracles!) and I had to have crutches for several weeks. Stairs and crutches are an awful combination.
As I’ve mentioned before, the area I grew up in was mostly military. There were / are 3 Air Force bases in the area, Lackland, Randolph and Brooks, in addition to the Army’s Fort Sam Houston. My mom was working as a civilian at Fort Sam, her best friend (who lived just down the street from us) worked at Randolph AFB. Almost ALL of my friends were military brats like me, a few were locals – small town born and raised. Some had been there for generations.
In my class we had the preacher’s daughters from two different churches, the town mechanic’s son, the grocer’s kids, the Sheriff’s daughter (she was one of my “best” friends), assorted policeman’s and fireman’s kids, the dentist’s daughter and the doctor’s son (who were “going together”) and the guy who owned the Dairy Queen’s daughter. It was truly the epitome of small town life.
Thursday, June 22, 2006
Praying Mantis*
The heat makes me home sick. Granted a 100 degree afternoon here in California isn’t quite the same as a 100 degree afternoon in Texas or Mississippi once you throw in the humidity but something about it always makes me nostalgic. Maybe it’s because we don’t have truly HOT days around here too often? I think it’s the combination of a lot of things - Father’s Day, TheBoy’s and my anniversary coming up (5 years next week), the heat, all the weddings… I am so homesick right now I can hardly stand it. It’s almost a PHYSICAL feeling, an ache, something missing.
Last night TheBoy and I decided it was entirely too hot to stay in our second floor apartment another second so we wandered downtown and decided to have dinner at a relatively new Mediterranean restaurant we hadn’t yet had the chance to try. We sat outside, shared a couple of dishes, drank some wine (me) and Greek beer (him) and I told him stories of all the things I missed about living in the South…
~ The food. Comfort food. Making things from scratch… People were defined by things there. We had a neighbor who made the best peach pies in the county. It was a fact. There was a restaurant in town with homemade biscuits that were SO flaky. Chicken fried steak, crisp fried okra, collard greens, black eyed peas, cobblers made with berries and peaches picked just that morning. Jam was an art. Cornbread and sweet tea were served with just about everything. Food was about… nurturing. My memories of food from and the South somehow are separate from all issues with calorie counting and portion control and nutrition.
~ The pace. Life moved slower. I get too caught up here in rushing around and traffic and deadlines and the sheer masses of humanity that exist in the Bay Area… I need to learn to take more time. Breathe.
~ Sunday afternoons. Growing up I always went to church on Sunday. My father always went to some sort of Pentecostal Non-Denominational type church and my mom would alternate between the Southern Baptists and the Methodists (when those Baptists got too crazy for her!). I’m not going to get in to my relationship with God here because that would take a whole LOT of time but as a child I loved church. I loved getting dressed up in my Sunday dresses and going to Sunday School. I loved the stories of Jesus and the craft times and the singing. After church there would always be a big lunch, sometimes a restaurant but most often a BBQ in someone’s backyard or a picnic at a park. In Mississippi we’d head down to the river. There I would change out of my dress and run around and play and climb trees and get dirty and just generally be carefree. In the late afternoon we’d all take a nap, even the adults. Lazy Sundays in the South.
~ Feeling safe. I used to ride my bike in to town to get ice cream on Saturday mornings with my friends. At 10. We’d be gone ALL DAY. I used to walk every where, between friends houses, to the country club where the pool was, to the Circle K for a soda, out by the fire lane to explore, alone… It never occurred to me to be worried. My mother used to do the same thing. I don’t think it occurred to her either. And yet now I won’t even walk the 30 feet from my car to the door of my apartment without consciously scanning the area to see who is there and making sure I have my purse held tight and keys in hand. I even own pepper spray! I don’t know if I want kids but if I did I would want to raise them some place where they could have the same feeling of safety that I had growing up.
~ I think the rest of the things we talked about could just be lumped under “small town life”. I miss volunteer fire departments – I remember all the husbands and fathers on our street belonged to one and that I always thought one day *my* husband would be Captain. I was always one to aim for the top. I miss knowing the name of the people who owned the grocery store, the local diner, the gas station. Or I suppose, more importantly, I miss having those people know me. Know my mama. That’s one of my favorite Southern greetings, “How’s your Mama and them?” It just seems so personal. I miss County Fairs; or rather I miss it being cool to go to County Fairs. I miss dances at city hall and things of that nature, spaghetti feeds hosted by the 4H from the High School, High School football games on Friday nights. Community.
Yep – there is that ache again. I think I’ll go out and enjoy some of this heat on my lunch break. We’re due for 90 – 100 degree temps for the next several days. I’m loving it!
*In case you are wondering at the seemingly totally random title to this post… I did mention that the one thing I DON’T miss about the South is the bugs. Namely the fact that the bugs are HUGE there! But then as I was sitting there thinking about it I realized that I do miss Praying Mantis (Praying Manti?) They used to fascinate me as a child. In fact I vividly remember sitting on a parking wall outside of church in Mississippi as a child on Sunday TALKING to a Praying Mantis… I was an only child y’all. Cut me some slack.
Last night TheBoy and I decided it was entirely too hot to stay in our second floor apartment another second so we wandered downtown and decided to have dinner at a relatively new Mediterranean restaurant we hadn’t yet had the chance to try. We sat outside, shared a couple of dishes, drank some wine (me) and Greek beer (him) and I told him stories of all the things I missed about living in the South…
~ The food. Comfort food. Making things from scratch… People were defined by things there. We had a neighbor who made the best peach pies in the county. It was a fact. There was a restaurant in town with homemade biscuits that were SO flaky. Chicken fried steak, crisp fried okra, collard greens, black eyed peas, cobblers made with berries and peaches picked just that morning. Jam was an art. Cornbread and sweet tea were served with just about everything. Food was about… nurturing. My memories of food from and the South somehow are separate from all issues with calorie counting and portion control and nutrition.
~ The pace. Life moved slower. I get too caught up here in rushing around and traffic and deadlines and the sheer masses of humanity that exist in the Bay Area… I need to learn to take more time. Breathe.
~ Sunday afternoons. Growing up I always went to church on Sunday. My father always went to some sort of Pentecostal Non-Denominational type church and my mom would alternate between the Southern Baptists and the Methodists (when those Baptists got too crazy for her!). I’m not going to get in to my relationship with God here because that would take a whole LOT of time but as a child I loved church. I loved getting dressed up in my Sunday dresses and going to Sunday School. I loved the stories of Jesus and the craft times and the singing. After church there would always be a big lunch, sometimes a restaurant but most often a BBQ in someone’s backyard or a picnic at a park. In Mississippi we’d head down to the river. There I would change out of my dress and run around and play and climb trees and get dirty and just generally be carefree. In the late afternoon we’d all take a nap, even the adults. Lazy Sundays in the South.
~ Feeling safe. I used to ride my bike in to town to get ice cream on Saturday mornings with my friends. At 10. We’d be gone ALL DAY. I used to walk every where, between friends houses, to the country club where the pool was, to the Circle K for a soda, out by the fire lane to explore, alone… It never occurred to me to be worried. My mother used to do the same thing. I don’t think it occurred to her either. And yet now I won’t even walk the 30 feet from my car to the door of my apartment without consciously scanning the area to see who is there and making sure I have my purse held tight and keys in hand. I even own pepper spray! I don’t know if I want kids but if I did I would want to raise them some place where they could have the same feeling of safety that I had growing up.
~ I think the rest of the things we talked about could just be lumped under “small town life”. I miss volunteer fire departments – I remember all the husbands and fathers on our street belonged to one and that I always thought one day *my* husband would be Captain. I was always one to aim for the top. I miss knowing the name of the people who owned the grocery store, the local diner, the gas station. Or I suppose, more importantly, I miss having those people know me. Know my mama. That’s one of my favorite Southern greetings, “How’s your Mama and them?” It just seems so personal. I miss County Fairs; or rather I miss it being cool to go to County Fairs. I miss dances at city hall and things of that nature, spaghetti feeds hosted by the 4H from the High School, High School football games on Friday nights. Community.
Yep – there is that ache again. I think I’ll go out and enjoy some of this heat on my lunch break. We’re due for 90 – 100 degree temps for the next several days. I’m loving it!
*In case you are wondering at the seemingly totally random title to this post… I did mention that the one thing I DON’T miss about the South is the bugs. Namely the fact that the bugs are HUGE there! But then as I was sitting there thinking about it I realized that I do miss Praying Mantis (Praying Manti?) They used to fascinate me as a child. In fact I vividly remember sitting on a parking wall outside of church in Mississippi as a child on Sunday TALKING to a Praying Mantis… I was an only child y’all. Cut me some slack.
Wednesday, June 21, 2006
Flood
I had no idea that trying to write something for Father’s Day would open the proverbial flood gates. But open them it has. And not just about Jim, but about home and the South and small town living and who I really am and who I want to be and… Are y’all ready for this? Because I’m not sure I am! Seriously. I’ve been writing. Some here… Some in a journal at home. I’m not sure yet which things I’ll post and which I’ll just save for me because it turns out I’m not as brave as I thought I was. I truly admire the writers out there (Laurie, Purl, Kristi – I’m looking at you – there are others) who put themselves, their whole selves, into their writing. It feels honest. I wish I had that! But sometimes I sit down and I write and pour out my thoughts and then I go back and read it and think… Crap! Am I THAT angry? Or… Maybe it just comes out a little more vulnerable than I’d like?
Last night I had TheBoy pull down my storage boxes from the garage in hopes that some of my old photo albums would be in there. I had a mind to scan and post my “Mary Lou” photo from yesterdays post. And also, I can’t bring to mind the exact details of my father’s face. I just have a fuzzy image of reddish hair, ruddy cheeks – looks not unlike my own. Growing up everyone would say to my mom, “she looks just like you!” She would always respond, “no – you should see her father.” As I get older I see more and more the similarities in my mother’s face and mine but I know I look a lot like Jim. Last night, for whatever reason, I just could not go on without seeing his face. Unfortunately, the boxes did not contain the albums I was hoping for. I’m wondering if my mother has them or if I really did throw all those photos out in a fit of anger several years ago.
But I did find a few photos. I thought I’d save them to post when I got to writing stories that fit the time frame but I keep finding myself looking at them. These were taken the weekend I graduated high school. The man in these photos is a stranger. His face is not the one I went searching for last night. By the time these pictures were taken I had not seen him in over 6 years. I have not seen him since, 9 years this month. I suppose if I squint I can see the man I called “Daddy” in these photos… His hair was redder, his face thinner, the glasses were similar, he almost always had a mustache, I don’t recall the beard. The picture at dinner is more familiar (he's the one on my left - the couple on my right in my mom and Al). You can see the emotional distance between us in the picture at Pier 39.
And just for fun… Here’s a picture of me and Al, my step-dad, from the same weekend. He’s awesome.
Last night I had TheBoy pull down my storage boxes from the garage in hopes that some of my old photo albums would be in there. I had a mind to scan and post my “Mary Lou” photo from yesterdays post. And also, I can’t bring to mind the exact details of my father’s face. I just have a fuzzy image of reddish hair, ruddy cheeks – looks not unlike my own. Growing up everyone would say to my mom, “she looks just like you!” She would always respond, “no – you should see her father.” As I get older I see more and more the similarities in my mother’s face and mine but I know I look a lot like Jim. Last night, for whatever reason, I just could not go on without seeing his face. Unfortunately, the boxes did not contain the albums I was hoping for. I’m wondering if my mother has them or if I really did throw all those photos out in a fit of anger several years ago.
But I did find a few photos. I thought I’d save them to post when I got to writing stories that fit the time frame but I keep finding myself looking at them. These were taken the weekend I graduated high school. The man in these photos is a stranger. His face is not the one I went searching for last night. By the time these pictures were taken I had not seen him in over 6 years. I have not seen him since, 9 years this month. I suppose if I squint I can see the man I called “Daddy” in these photos… His hair was redder, his face thinner, the glasses were similar, he almost always had a mustache, I don’t recall the beard. The picture at dinner is more familiar (he's the one on my left - the couple on my right in my mom and Al). You can see the emotional distance between us in the picture at Pier 39.
And just for fun… Here’s a picture of me and Al, my step-dad, from the same weekend. He’s awesome.
Tuesday, June 20, 2006
Daddy's Girl
I wasn’t always estranged from my father.
In fact, I used to consider myself quite the daddy’s girl. I was also a grandpa’s girl – but that’s a whole other story. I always just thought I got along better with the men in my life. Heh. My parents divorced when I was very small. I don’t remember them married, I know that when I was two I went to live with my grandparents for the summer while my mom got back on her feet after the divorce. All the details of selling the house, moving and switching jobs (she was still working for the military then) were a lot to handle with a toddler. Throw a divorce into the mix and… Well I suppose it was just easier. She said that was one of the loneliest times of her life.
Anyway, I remember my father being a part of my life when I was young. He rode a motorcycle and I had a seat on the back and a tiny helmet. We drove to my daycare / pre-school on this road that had an underpass. Small things. His apartment complex had a pool. In fact, that is a recurring theme – he and I shared a love of the water. He wore a mustache and had those 70’s style brown tinted sunglasses. Ruddy cheeks like mine.
Sometime before I started school my father relocated to Mississippi, where he remains to this day. (I know he’s still there because I did a Google search for him and found the white pages listing for him and his current wife. I’m human.) I went out to live with him in the first grade but I had been out there to visit before. I’m fuzzy on the timing… He was remarried at this time. Wife number three (my mother was number two – that’s also a whole other story), her name was Connie, and short of my mother she was my favorite of his wives. We actually got back in touch several years ago but have lost touch again.
That year in Mississippi was probably the best and worst year of my childhood. I remember feeling conflicted – though I didn’t understand that’s what I was feeling. I would be so elated to be with my daddy and yet… Somehow it wasn’t right. I missed my mom terribly but I was desperate for her to think things were great because I didn’t want to leave. I remember feeling guilty for thinking maybe I loved my dad more than my mom? How could I have thought that at so young?
I did horribly in school that year. I had my own special desk outside of the classroom because I was constantly in trouble. There was a woman across the street that had three daughters and would watch me after school but she ignored me for the most part and I was terribly jealous so I bit her daughter HARD, the one closest to my age, one day in the van on the way home from school. I drew blood. The woman spanked me and then dropped me off at the house and refused to watch me anymore. I didn’t care. I just wanted to spend time with daddy. I remember not understanding why I had to go to school and why he had to go to work. I remember resenting Connie. Until she bought me a dog. Then I remember thinking she wasn’t so bad.
Was that the year Mary Lou Retton won the gold in the Olympics? I ask because there is a picture of me in my Team USA gymnastics leotard outside of our house there in Pearl posing. Just like Mary Lou. She was my hero. I don’t even know where those pictures are anymore… I hope I just boxed them up and stored them. I have a sneaking suspicion I may have thrown them away.
After that year was over I moved back with my mom. I think she was in CA at the time. Maybe even Bay Area. I moved a lot so I’m slightly fuzzy! It might have been Oregon and then California… I’m not too sure. But anyway I was back with mom. And I sobbed the whole flight home. Uncontrollable, ugly, body racking sobs. I remember people staring. I was so sad to be leaving my daddy. And yet once I was home and the sadness had passed I realized how nice it was to be home with a parent who had discipline and home cooked meals and knew how to do laundry. Where I had a proper bed instead of a folding pallet/chair/futon thingy in the corner. My own room. But I still felt guilty… Like maybe I did really love my dad more?
I went back to see my dad every summer. Generally he would take the time off while I was there. If not all of it at least as much as he could. He would plan things for us to do. Rapids on the Reservoir was a local water park that I loved. We went to Florida. We went to the park on the river. There were always big lunches after church. Late night runs to DQ for a dip. Roller skating, fire works, and lots and lots of swimming. I definitely inherited my love of the water from him.
Every time I would leave my mom I would be filled with anticipation and excitement to go see my dad and every time I would leave to come home to my mom I would be devastated. When we moved to Texas I thought it would be better because, well, you people own a map, Texas is closer to Mississippi than California! I’d get to see daddy even more!
Somehow this is not what ended up happening…
In fact, I used to consider myself quite the daddy’s girl. I was also a grandpa’s girl – but that’s a whole other story. I always just thought I got along better with the men in my life. Heh. My parents divorced when I was very small. I don’t remember them married, I know that when I was two I went to live with my grandparents for the summer while my mom got back on her feet after the divorce. All the details of selling the house, moving and switching jobs (she was still working for the military then) were a lot to handle with a toddler. Throw a divorce into the mix and… Well I suppose it was just easier. She said that was one of the loneliest times of her life.
Anyway, I remember my father being a part of my life when I was young. He rode a motorcycle and I had a seat on the back and a tiny helmet. We drove to my daycare / pre-school on this road that had an underpass. Small things. His apartment complex had a pool. In fact, that is a recurring theme – he and I shared a love of the water. He wore a mustache and had those 70’s style brown tinted sunglasses. Ruddy cheeks like mine.
Sometime before I started school my father relocated to Mississippi, where he remains to this day. (I know he’s still there because I did a Google search for him and found the white pages listing for him and his current wife. I’m human.) I went out to live with him in the first grade but I had been out there to visit before. I’m fuzzy on the timing… He was remarried at this time. Wife number three (my mother was number two – that’s also a whole other story), her name was Connie, and short of my mother she was my favorite of his wives. We actually got back in touch several years ago but have lost touch again.
That year in Mississippi was probably the best and worst year of my childhood. I remember feeling conflicted – though I didn’t understand that’s what I was feeling. I would be so elated to be with my daddy and yet… Somehow it wasn’t right. I missed my mom terribly but I was desperate for her to think things were great because I didn’t want to leave. I remember feeling guilty for thinking maybe I loved my dad more than my mom? How could I have thought that at so young?
I did horribly in school that year. I had my own special desk outside of the classroom because I was constantly in trouble. There was a woman across the street that had three daughters and would watch me after school but she ignored me for the most part and I was terribly jealous so I bit her daughter HARD, the one closest to my age, one day in the van on the way home from school. I drew blood. The woman spanked me and then dropped me off at the house and refused to watch me anymore. I didn’t care. I just wanted to spend time with daddy. I remember not understanding why I had to go to school and why he had to go to work. I remember resenting Connie. Until she bought me a dog. Then I remember thinking she wasn’t so bad.
Was that the year Mary Lou Retton won the gold in the Olympics? I ask because there is a picture of me in my Team USA gymnastics leotard outside of our house there in Pearl posing. Just like Mary Lou. She was my hero. I don’t even know where those pictures are anymore… I hope I just boxed them up and stored them. I have a sneaking suspicion I may have thrown them away.
After that year was over I moved back with my mom. I think she was in CA at the time. Maybe even Bay Area. I moved a lot so I’m slightly fuzzy! It might have been Oregon and then California… I’m not too sure. But anyway I was back with mom. And I sobbed the whole flight home. Uncontrollable, ugly, body racking sobs. I remember people staring. I was so sad to be leaving my daddy. And yet once I was home and the sadness had passed I realized how nice it was to be home with a parent who had discipline and home cooked meals and knew how to do laundry. Where I had a proper bed instead of a folding pallet/chair/futon thingy in the corner. My own room. But I still felt guilty… Like maybe I did really love my dad more?
I went back to see my dad every summer. Generally he would take the time off while I was there. If not all of it at least as much as he could. He would plan things for us to do. Rapids on the Reservoir was a local water park that I loved. We went to Florida. We went to the park on the river. There were always big lunches after church. Late night runs to DQ for a dip. Roller skating, fire works, and lots and lots of swimming. I definitely inherited my love of the water from him.
Every time I would leave my mom I would be filled with anticipation and excitement to go see my dad and every time I would leave to come home to my mom I would be devastated. When we moved to Texas I thought it would be better because, well, you people own a map, Texas is closer to Mississippi than California! I’d get to see daddy even more!
Somehow this is not what ended up happening…
Monday, June 12, 2006
One of those days
I actually just got shushed for making too much noise taping up boxes y’all. No I’m not kidding. I actually laughed at first because… She could possibly be serious right? This woman who has never said a word to me? But no. She seriously wanted to know if I could “do that” (ie: tape up boxes to mail out client gifts) “some other time”. I politely told her no, that I’m not in the habit of staying after hours, but that I’d be done shortly.
Some people have such nerve!
But then I had to laugh because as I was walking through the reception area not 5 minutes ago I heard her in there asking the receptionist and another girl who works on another floor to please refrain from having personal conversations at the front desk as she can hear them from her cube.
Apparently she’s just having a bad day. So I went by her desk on my way back to my cube and smiled at her. I mean really y’all. It can’t possibly be THAT bad can it?!?!
*****
TheBoy and I went up to Lake Shasta with Christine and Michael this weekend. The weather was perfect and, even though I couldn’t wakeboard because of the never-ending knee saga, much fun was had by all.
You know it’s a good sign when the tequila is half gone, the sun is still shining hot and you’ve got hours of swimming and eating and hanging out to do with friends.
I remember thinking when I was in the midst of the break-up drama with my ex how much I was going to miss going to the lake. It was our favorite thing to do and I never thought I’d meet another boy who loved it as much as I do. But I was wrong. I met a boy who quite possibly loves it MORE. And as an added bonus he doesn’t make me feel bad about myself.
*****
I’m also happy to report that I have been knee-pain free for 4 days now! Yippee! Of course I’m on super drugs at the moment. I’ve also been sworn off any kind of heeled shoe for the next two weeks but whatever! NO PAIN! No vomiting! I’m a brand new girl.
Just cross your fingers and hope this crap lasts in 8 days when I’m on my own and drug free… K?
*****
Also, it has come to my own attention that I am entirely too anal retentive. I am working on it. The last few weeks have been a complete exercise in me NOT having 100% control over a situation that normally I would have been ALL OVER. I think it’s working well. I’m not totally comfortable with it, but I haven’t killed any one so it’s a start! ;^D
In that regard, everyone out there in IIF-land, please send your prayers (or well wishes – whatever) towards my friend Angie (the Bride-to-be) and her family. Y’all are the best!
Some people have such nerve!
But then I had to laugh because as I was walking through the reception area not 5 minutes ago I heard her in there asking the receptionist and another girl who works on another floor to please refrain from having personal conversations at the front desk as she can hear them from her cube.
Apparently she’s just having a bad day. So I went by her desk on my way back to my cube and smiled at her. I mean really y’all. It can’t possibly be THAT bad can it?!?!
*****
TheBoy and I went up to Lake Shasta with Christine and Michael this weekend. The weather was perfect and, even though I couldn’t wakeboard because of the never-ending knee saga, much fun was had by all.
You know it’s a good sign when the tequila is half gone, the sun is still shining hot and you’ve got hours of swimming and eating and hanging out to do with friends.
I remember thinking when I was in the midst of the break-up drama with my ex how much I was going to miss going to the lake. It was our favorite thing to do and I never thought I’d meet another boy who loved it as much as I do. But I was wrong. I met a boy who quite possibly loves it MORE. And as an added bonus he doesn’t make me feel bad about myself.
*****
I’m also happy to report that I have been knee-pain free for 4 days now! Yippee! Of course I’m on super drugs at the moment. I’ve also been sworn off any kind of heeled shoe for the next two weeks but whatever! NO PAIN! No vomiting! I’m a brand new girl.
Just cross your fingers and hope this crap lasts in 8 days when I’m on my own and drug free… K?
*****
Also, it has come to my own attention that I am entirely too anal retentive. I am working on it. The last few weeks have been a complete exercise in me NOT having 100% control over a situation that normally I would have been ALL OVER. I think it’s working well. I’m not totally comfortable with it, but I haven’t killed any one so it’s a start! ;^D
In that regard, everyone out there in IIF-land, please send your prayers (or well wishes – whatever) towards my friend Angie (the Bride-to-be) and her family. Y’all are the best!
Tuesday, June 06, 2006
Leftward leanings
I’m giving y’all fair warning that I’m about to talk about politics. So feel free to navigate away now. But with the passing of Memorial Day recently, and the elections today it just seems that I can’t hold it in any longer. I was having a conversation recently in which I found myself in the uncomfortable position of defending myself and political views. So I’m just going to spell this out, once and for all, for the people in the back…
Just because my political views lean towards the liberal DOES NOT MEAN that I do not support the troops. This is just the most plain assinine jump from A to Z that I have ever seen. I also do not hate God or the entire Government, which are two other things I’ve been told that I must do as a Liberal.
Both of my parents served in the military. I grew up on and around military bases. My first boy / girl moments EVER involved basic training boys running laps in early morning light… God BLESS the USA y’all. Seriously though. I grew up in a SMALL town with three Air Force bases and an Army base within driving distance. During Desert Shield / Desert Storm I knew exactly what it meant when my friends mommys and daddys were gone.
So maybe it grates on my nerves just A LITTLE BIT when people tell me that because I’m a liberal and that I don’t necessarily agree with this particular war in Iraq that it means I don’t support the troops.
“They have turned criticism of the policies of Bastards in Suits into criticism of The People in Uniform Getting Shot At. This, of course, is completely wrong, as one can easily tell the difference between the Bastards in Suits and The People in Uniform Getting Shot At. One group is in Suits, and Not Getting Shot At, while another is in Uniform, and Getting Shot At.” – from Kung Fu Monkey, a newly discovered and (shockingly) now favored blog.*
I was thrilled to see all the regognition Memorial Day got among the bloggers this year. But I would just add one thing (which I also heard but not nearly enough)… Memorial Day is great, but it’s easy. You remember people who have gone and are not coming back. The Heros. The POW. The MIA. But we should also take time out to remember the ones who could be back tomorrow if we (or those Bastards in Suits) chose it.
*Post entited “Lions Led by Donkeys” – a must read if you had liberal leanings. Or if you’re at all curious about how MY mind ticks… ;^D
Just because my political views lean towards the liberal DOES NOT MEAN that I do not support the troops. This is just the most plain assinine jump from A to Z that I have ever seen. I also do not hate God or the entire Government, which are two other things I’ve been told that I must do as a Liberal.
Both of my parents served in the military. I grew up on and around military bases. My first boy / girl moments EVER involved basic training boys running laps in early morning light… God BLESS the USA y’all. Seriously though. I grew up in a SMALL town with three Air Force bases and an Army base within driving distance. During Desert Shield / Desert Storm I knew exactly what it meant when my friends mommys and daddys were gone.
So maybe it grates on my nerves just A LITTLE BIT when people tell me that because I’m a liberal and that I don’t necessarily agree with this particular war in Iraq that it means I don’t support the troops.
“They have turned criticism of the policies of Bastards in Suits into criticism of The People in Uniform Getting Shot At. This, of course, is completely wrong, as one can easily tell the difference between the Bastards in Suits and The People in Uniform Getting Shot At. One group is in Suits, and Not Getting Shot At, while another is in Uniform, and Getting Shot At.” – from Kung Fu Monkey, a newly discovered and (shockingly) now favored blog.*
I was thrilled to see all the regognition Memorial Day got among the bloggers this year. But I would just add one thing (which I also heard but not nearly enough)… Memorial Day is great, but it’s easy. You remember people who have gone and are not coming back. The Heros. The POW. The MIA. But we should also take time out to remember the ones who could be back tomorrow if we (or those Bastards in Suits) chose it.
*Post entited “Lions Led by Donkeys” – a must read if you had liberal leanings. Or if you’re at all curious about how MY mind ticks… ;^D
Sounds of Silence
Have you ever known that someone was trying to manipulate you to get something they wanted? Even though they knew it’s not something you wanted to give to them? I’m not talking about something mean or hurtful here…
Have you ever made a difficult decision, spent countless hours and days agonizing over whether or not you were making a mistake only to feel an immense sense of relief once the decision was made? Has that decision ever not been accepted by the other party involved?
What does it mean when you finally realize that you are never going to get the one thing you thought you wanted more than anything, and you can’t even bring yourself to be properly sad over it? What does it mean if you just feel sort of… tired?
Have you ever made a difficult decision, spent countless hours and days agonizing over whether or not you were making a mistake only to feel an immense sense of relief once the decision was made? Has that decision ever not been accepted by the other party involved?
What does it mean when you finally realize that you are never going to get the one thing you thought you wanted more than anything, and you can’t even bring yourself to be properly sad over it? What does it mean if you just feel sort of… tired?
Friday, June 02, 2006
Contents
I’ve been tagged! So y’all can thank Liz because the post I WAS working on was political in nature. Because THAT’S the kind of day I’m having. But I think posts on cheating, pain and politics are too much for a 24 hour window don’t you? So I’ll save the political one for another day…
(insert sigh of relief here)
And now on to the main event!
5 Items in my Fridge:
Beer
Eggs
Cheese
Smart Balance
Iced Tea
5 Items in my Closet:
More shoes than I care to mention
Purses
Luggage
The Cat Box
Angie’s Wedding Dress!
5 Items in my Car:
Yoga Mat
Sunscreen
Scarves (for tying hair back with the top down)
Sunglasses
Inverter
5 Items in my Purse:
Wallet
Digital Camera & extra batteries!
Cell Phone
Chapstick – more than one tube!
Nail file
I feel like I just totally lived up to my “boring” name!
(insert sigh of relief here)
And now on to the main event!
5 Items in my Fridge:
Beer
Eggs
Cheese
Smart Balance
Iced Tea
5 Items in my Closet:
More shoes than I care to mention
Purses
Luggage
The Cat Box
Angie’s Wedding Dress!
5 Items in my Car:
Yoga Mat
Sunscreen
Scarves (for tying hair back with the top down)
Sunglasses
Inverter
5 Items in my Purse:
Wallet
Digital Camera & extra batteries!
Cell Phone
Chapstick – more than one tube!
Nail file
I feel like I just totally lived up to my “boring” name!
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