Greatest Survey EVER

Thanks to Kate for giving me something to blog about when my brain has pretty much turned to mush in the week before my wedding!

If you were God for a day, what would you do? I have NO idea. I’m not sure I want that kind of responsibility!

If you could be the parent of one famous person, who would you want it to be? Hm. Someone with a lot of money that could take care of me in my old age! Like Britney. Never mind that she’s only like 4 years younger than me… that girl needs a hug!

What was the last thing you regret buying? I don’t suffer from buyer’s remorse too often… But I do suffer from eater’s remorse… So maybe that Taco Bell burrito I bought on my way home from my (soon to be) Sister-in-law’s a few weekends back. My ass surely didn’t need it!

There's a monster in your closet. What do you do? Make sure it isn’t wearing my clothes in there!

If you could bring back one person from the dead, who would it be? Luckily I haven’t really had too many people close to me die. And those that have passed on lived full lives. “To every thing there is a time and a purpose…” and all that.

What are 3 things you'd like to learn to do? Play the guitar, ride a bike, and invest.

What is your favorite kind of cheese? I am an equal opportunity cheese lover. Sadly it doesn’t love ME as much as I love IT. Don’t things always work that way?

If you had a truth serum, who would you give it to and what would you ask? I’m not sure I would want to know anything I had to use truth serum to force out of someone!

How do you know when you're in love? When you think of them and their happiness before your own.

Why do you have a cell phone? All the cool kids were getting them.

What do you consider the most important invention? Kate said bras which made me laugh out loud! I’m going to go with the Internet (thank you Al Gore).

How would you spend your ideal day? Sleeping in with TheBoy, making a huge breakfast and drinking mimosas outside on a warm summer morning, followed with a bit of wakeboarding on Lake Shasta, a bonfire and BBQ in the evening with some good friends and good tequila, and sleeping soundly like only a full day in the sun can make me do. (And well a few other things that it isn’t polite to announce to the internets at large – ahem.)

Why are a fly and a tree alike? They both have great views of the world? Is this a trick question?

What is too serious to be joked about? Rape.

3 words to describe your personality: Loud, loyal, honest.

3 words to describe your looks: um… short, blonde and… cute? I guess. People always say that. “Tiff is cute.” Just once I’d like to be “stunning” or “sexy” – le sigh.

Who would you choose to be shipwrecked on a deserted island with? I know I should say TheBoy and all but really if I HAVE to be shipwrecked I’d pick some Navy Seal or Marine or… MacGyver or something. Someone who can get my ass OFF the island!

What is your idea of a perfect romantic evening? Fantastic food, great wine, sitting outside by a fire… Great conversation.

If you could be remembered for one thing, what would it be? That I was a good friend.

Someone kicks a cat in front of you. What do you do? Kick their freaking ASS!

You meet God. What is the one question you want to ask Him? Why?

If you saw someone stealing, what would you do? I’m not sure really. Are they bigger than me? I might confront them or I might just alert the authorities… I don’t know. That a tough one!

Have you ever been the victim of racism? Is discrimination against Blondes a form of racism? I’ve certainly been a victim of sexism.

Is there anything you would willingly give your life for? I don’t know. I’d like to think I would give up my life if it meant salvation of an entire population of people but… I don’t know.

If you could re-live one day, what would it be? I’m not sure I would. Life is meant to be lived in a forward motion y’all!

If you could be invisible for a day, what would you do? Heh. Sneak into someplace I’m not supposed to be maybe?

Do you like raw vegetables? Sure do.

Do you dress for fashion or comfort? Comfort. But lately I’ve been trying to “dress for success” and success isn’t as comfy as I had hoped it would be.

Have you ever owned a pogo stick? Nope. But my friend Kathy Ann from the 6th grade owned one. It was fun. And harder than it looks.

What kind of old person do you want to be? An active one.

What is the best question in the world? Why?

What is the worst holiday experience you've ever had? I once took a high school boyfriend up to Chico to visit his mom (whom he hadn’t seen in years) for Thanksgiving. I realized about 12 seconds into the car ride up there that this guy had serious, SERIOUS issues and that I a) desperately wanted to break up with him and b) that I missed my mama!

Ever been accused of doing something you didn't? Who hasn’t?

If you had to listen to one song over and over forever, what would it be? Forever? Right now I’m digging some old Skynard so maybe like “Simple Kind of Man” or “Free Bird” but I’m fairly sure I’d be sick of anything within a week if I had to listen to it over and over and over.

If you had to marry someone you are not in love with, who would it be? A ridiculously wealthy guy who treated me nicely and with respect and looked the other way when I took a lover?

Would you tell your best friend if you saw their spouse cheating on them? Probably. Lord I hope I never find out though.

If you had to be a TV character, who would it be? Evie from Out of This World. How cool would it be to be able to pause real life?!!? Like TiVo only WAY cooler.

What is the greatest unsolved mystery of all? The intricacies of human nature.

Is it easier to forgive or forget? It’s easy to forgive once you’ve decided to. It’s sometimes impossible to forget no matter how badly you wish you could.

If you could read anyone's diary, whose would it be? Hm. Maybe my mom’s from when she was my age.

If you are what you eat, you are? A sugar-free red bull. I know it’s not food but that’s all I’ve had in the past 18 hours or so!

If you KNEW for a fact there was a heaven and a hell, what would you do? Go back to church.

Do you enjoy duct tape? Of course! It was my runner up answer to the question about the greatest invention ever! Though as entertaining as duct tape is it isn’t quite as informative as the internet.

Who is a hero of yours? My mom. For sure.

Have you ever laughed at a funeral? Actually yes. But everyone else was laughing too. And I think the guy would have appreciated that we were remembering the good times.