Friday, October 28, 2005

The. Scariest. Cab. Ride. Ever.

Now, I've had some pretty notable cab rides. For example every cab ride I took the entire time I was in Las Vegas for my friend Richelle's Bachelorette Party a few years ago. Let's just say Taxi Cab Confessions really missed out with us that weekend!

But. Last Saturday night / early Sunday morning coming back from Sin? I'd have to say that cab ride takes the prize. Or rather that cab driver...

First off. We go outside to get in and the heater is up full blast. Seriously y'all it was 85 degrees in there AT LEAST. The cabbie does not seem to think this is odd. AND it's not even that cold outside!

Then there were the random comments as we got in about TheBoy being a lucky man. Granted both Liz and I were in short and somewhat sheer dresses... But it was a freaking costume party! We also had wings! And TheBoy was dressed as a devil - full on horns and everything. But he still wanted to make sure we knew that he noticed us. We get it. Fine. Whatever.

And then the most appalling sentence to ever be uttered by a cab driver came out of his mouth. Someone is calling him on his little CB radio thingy and so he picks it up and says...

"Don't worry Dave - I'm sober. I'm heading to Mountain View."

I shit you not.

I considered, briefly, getting out of the damn car and going back inside for more booze. CLEARLY I had not had enough to drink to be in the cab with this guy.

Instead I contented myself with squeezing Liz's hand, hard, and desperately trying to not make eye contact with this guy so as to discourage further conversation.

No such luck. He kept up a steady stream of neurotic babble the entire way home!

Also, he was playing classical music. Not that there is anything wrong with classical music... It's just that he just didn't appear to be the type of guy to enjoy it really. Not that I should be judging. I shouldn't. I know that. At one point during the drive he even mentioned it. Said "it's great driving music". He then promptly changed the channel to some heavier classic rock and turned it up really loud explaining "this is the stuff I really like. But then I drive too fast."


I'm not sure if it was the looks of panic or the fact that traffic was indeed slowing down on the freeway that made him turn the volume down and switch back over to classical.

And if it's not enough that we were stuck with him for the roughly 10 mile trip home, the traffic on the freeway was coming to a rather abrupt halt as we all belatedly remembered that the south bound lanes were closed due to construction.


Let's just say I have never been so happy to see ChezGhetto in the entire time we've lived there. I was tossing cash at the driver and opening my door before he'd made it all the way in the driveway!

Friday Feast

What time do you usually wake up each day? If you could choose your wake-up time, when would it be?

I wake up at 5:00 am during the week for boot camp. But only for one more week. I usually wake up about 5:30 if I'm working out before work and 6:30 if I'm being lazy. On the weekends I'm usually up by 8 or so but I usually stay in bed and read for awhile. What can I say I'm a morning person!

When was the last time you bought groceries? What store did you go to? Name 3 things you purchased.

The last time I bought groceries was last Sunday. I went to Costco and Safeway. I bought a pot roast, sourdough bread and asparagus at Safeway and frozen potstickers, sugar-free Red Bull and beer at Costco.

How many books have you read so far this year? Which was your favorite and why?

Yikes! Maybe 25 or so? I have no idea! I read A LOT. It's hard to pick a favorite... But I just finished the latest Diana Gabaldon and it was SUPERB! LOVE her! Right now I'm reading The Knight of the Maison-Rouge.

Main Course
What is something you consider to be very elegant? In particular, what about that item/place/person conjures up the feeling of elegance?

I'm having a hard time with this question... When I think of elegance I think of people like Lady Diana and Jackie Kennedy-Onasis. But I'm not sure what it is about them that exudes grace. Maybe it's the quiet calm demeanor that is so different from my own? Or the underlying strength that you know is there just below the soft, gentle surface?

Who taught you how to drive?

It was a combination between my mother (who spent most of the time with her eyes closed), my step-dad Al (who fared slightly better) and my youth pastor Ben (who recently mentioned it in the context of "things I'm glad I didn't die doing"). Given all of that though I think I turned out to be a pretty good driver.

Thursday, October 27, 2005

Okay I'm jumping on the band wagon.

Thanks Kate! This MeMe was actually really fun to do! And the perfect way to pass the time on my lunch break.

Name someone with the same birthday as you. In jr. high school there were 4 people in my school of maybe 100 kids (K-8) with my same birthday! Our science and math teacher Brian Murphy, a boy in my class named Ryan Graves who moved to Florida at the end of 7th grade and another girl in Kindegarten whose name I can not remember. Crazy huh?

Where was your first kiss? In the middle of the road between our two houses. It was a neighbor boy who was a year older than me… We had been hanging out at his dad’s house with his sister (who is a year younger than me) and he offered to walk with me home. About half way down the street – his dad lived maybe 5 houses down from me – he grabbed me by the wrist and yanked me closer for a quick peck on the lips. His name was Justin and I was 12 I think. My first “french” kiss happened on New Year’s Day 1994 and it was with my first serious boyfriend ever and I was just so in love. The way you can only be the first time, you know? His name was Luke and I was a freshman in high school.

Have you ever seriously vandalized someone else’s property? No but I have been sorely tempted!

Have you ever hit someone of the opposite sex? Actually yes. But only once. My ex used to push my buttons sometimes for no other reason than I think he liked having the power to make me angry and/or make me cry. No – it was certainly NOT a healthy relationship – but we were very young. Anywho, we were skiing with his parents in Tahoe for the weekend… This must have been either my senior year of high school or my first year in college and he had been digging at me all day, saying things to make me upset and making me feel about 2” tall. Finally something just snapped! I whacked him with my ski pole! And of course I felt instantly guilty (hi! HUGE guilt complex over here!) but he skied off. A few hours later he found me in the lodge and he had let the sucker bleed all that time so it LOOKED horrible. After he finally washed there was just the tee-tiniest little scrape on his cheek. And you can believe he NEVER forgave me OR let it rest. That incident came up anytime he wanted to remind me what a horrible person I was.

Have you ever sung in front of a large number of people? Lots and lots. I used to fancy myself quite the singer! I sang in the choir in church and with the youth worship band. I’ve done musicals. I even once broke into song in the middle of a class in college. I don’t do those things anymore.

What’s the first thing you notice about the preferred sex? Posture. Then smile. Or eyes. It’s a tie between those last two things…

What is your biggest mistake? Feeling like I am not good enough… I know that 95% of the time those feelings are unfounded but I still always feel like I should be a better person, a better friend, a better daughter, a better girlfriend, etc…

Have you ever hurt yourself on purpose? Yes. Long story… I’ll get into it one day.

Say something totally random about yourself. I think I have developed sensitive skin in my old age! I have this totally odd rash around my ankles right now and I can not for the life of me figure out what it is from. And it looks horrible! I’m wearing long pants and boots today to cover it!

Has anyone ever said you look like a celebrity? I wish! Liz TOTALLY looks like Pink though!

Do you still watch kiddie movies or tv shows? Oh yeah. I think I own probably 25 Disney movies! I love Finding Nemo! But my all time favorite is Robin Hood – the Disney version where Robin and Maid Marion are foxes? My now Step-Father used to rent it practically every Friday night and bring it over when he came to visit my mom on the weekends when they were first dating.

Did you have braces? Nope. I was blessed with pretty good teeth from the get go. Though I do have a slight over-bite…

Are you comfortable with your height? I am now. I love being short! I’m 5’2” and I used to desperately wish to be 5’5” or taller. I wasn’t asking to be “tall” I just wanted to be as tall as the other “short” girls of our group in high school!

What is the most romantic thing someone of the opposite sex has done for you? TheBoy and I are not “romantic” in the traditional sense. I’ve had the guy who brought flowers and candy and made romantic evenings with candlelight and wine. He was always covering up for some bad thing that he had done though. I think it’s put me off that stuff forever! TheBoy is romantic in more of the everyday – this is my lifetime partner – way. Like I received a promotion at work and I called to tell him about it from my cell phone in the bathroom at work because I was super excited. That night when he came in from work he had two bottles of champagne so we could celebrate.

When do you know it’s love? I don’t know… you just know I think. It’s kind of a moment of awakening after all the giddiness and warm fuzzy feelings have passed and you realize that you really care about this person and want to make them happy and learn all there is to know about them. And you realize that they feel the same way about you. Sometimes there is an event that triggers it but oftentimes I think it’s just a gentle realization.

Do you speak any other languages? Lord no. I used to have a passing understanding of Spanish but it seems I’m a bit rusty. I still have a few words of Hungarian – mainly related to food or commands for the cat.

Have you ever been to a tanning salon? Yep – This girl gets practically florescent in the winter! But I had to stop because I was getting these weird bumps almost like a heat rash from it. See what I mean about the sensitive skin!?!?

What magazines do you read? I have subscriptions to Gourmet, Bon Appetit, Shape, Runner’s World, and Playboy (yes I do READ it). I also like People but don’t buy it that often, and I’ve been known to buy a Glamour or Elle or Vogue occassionally to take with me to the lake for lazy summer reading.

Have you ever ridden in a limo? Funny! I used to always say no, and I felt like I was missing out on something. But turns out I did – I just had forgotten about it! I took a limo from a training class in Forth Worth, TX to the airport last December. We had gotten out early and some of us Bay Area folk had switched our flights to an earlier time and the shuttle busses were waiting to have a full load before they left. One of the bankers in my class comandeered a limo that was randomly waiting around the hotel. But I don’t think it should count. That’s so not what I want my ONLY limo experience to be! I’ve always wanted to do one of those wine tasting things… Or maybe a bar crawl in SF.

Has anyone you were really close to passed away? My Nana (Mom’s best friend and my God Mother’s Mom) passed away a few months after we moved back to CA from TX. For years I felt guilty about it because she hadn’t wanted us to move away and we weren’t there when she got sick. There have been others but she’s the one that sticks in my mind.

Do you watch MTV? Not so much… There are no videos anymore! I do like the VMAs and the MTV Movie Awards though.

What’s something that really annoys you? People who do not control their children in public. Also, rude drivers. Does it really make them feel better to be one whole car in front of me?

What’s something you really like? Sitting somewhere with my girls just drinking wine, telling stories and laughing. And being at the lake.

Can you dance? Yes, actually I can. I don’t anymore than much though… Maybe 3 times a year max.

What’s the latest you have ever stayed up? Oh hell… I’ve stayed up all night before and one night in Vegas earlier this month we were out until 4:30 am. But generally as a rule I am in bed early! What can I say – I’m a morning person…

Have you ever been rushed by an ambulance into the emergency room? No. Thank God.

Feeling Blah...

No I'm not wandering around in my bathrobe muttering to myself... Yet. But I think it's a combination of the stress of waiting to hear on our offer for that house and the crappy gloomy weather outside that is making me feel so blah. I'd really like nothing more than to curl up in my pajamas and go back to bed. For like a week.

Of course when I start feeling blah I always seem to shift to thoughts in my head that are not necessarily so positive. This morning (and I mean early this morning - like 2 am) I start thinking about how my life is not at all what I thought it was going to be at this age. Does anybody else feel that?

When I was a little girl I couldn't wait to grow up! I thought my 20's were going to be IT. You know filled with weddings and an exciting career and owning a home and having babies. Well here I am on the tail end of that decade with none of those things accomplished. Granted my desire for ankle-biters has diminished rapidly over the years... But still. It's not quite what I thought it would be.

I think that's why the offer on this house is stressing me out so much. This is the first house that we've looked at that I can actually see us being happy in right away. Without tens of thousands of dollars spent in remodeling. And I can't help but think that if we DID get this house that at least I'd be one step closer to the place where I want to be.

But of course knowing our track record we probably won't. In the 10 days it takes the sellers to get back from their vacation there will be 2 more open houses and probably 5 more offers. And we'll be out bid. Again. But a girl can dream right? I mean it is possible...


Sorry for the gloomy gus this morning... I'm sure the sun will come out soon and I'll be back to my normal cheery self. In teh meantime, TheBoy has posted the pictures we took of the house online here if anyone is interested in checking it out.

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

More than you needed to know...

Who puts their house on the market and then goes on vacation for 2 weeks??!?!?? I mean honestly people! Don't they know that the suspense is getting to me? And that I may have to take to drinking heavily and wandering around in my bathrobe muttering to myself if they don't happen to check their messages between now and November 6th?


Yeah. So the sellers of the place that TheBoy and I made an offer on are somewhere in the middle of Arizona on vacation for the next 12 days. 12 freaking DAYS y'all! I may seriously come unhinged in the meantime.

Stupid out of state sellers.

So to keep myself pre-occupied I stole this MeMe from Liz. So I now present to you, "More than you ever needed to know about Tiffy".

A smell that makes you pause: wood burning fireplace smoke

A taste that makes you melt: Fresh summer berries

A drink you often order: Belvedere martini, dirty with extra olives

Music you prefer to listen to when you are alone: Wilson Phillips (shut up!)

The singer or band you currently listen to the most: Antigone Rising

The film you could watch over and over: Dirty Dancing

A TV show you watch regularly: Trucks (not by choice y’all, TheBoy controls the remote!)

Your favorite time of day: Early morning if I’m working out / running

If your house was burning, and you only had time to rescue three things, they would be:
1. TheBoy
2. TheCat
3. The necklace my mother designed / had made for me when I graduated high school

One person you might kill if you knew the law would protect you: Wow – I don’t think I dislike anyone enough to kill them!

If there were no side effects, you would enjoy being addicted to: I have no idea… Maybe some sort of speed or something to give me extra energy so I can get more stuff done. I never feel like there are enough hours in the day!

Have you ever been treated by a psychotherapist? no

The friend you have known for the longest amount of time: Angie – 13 years I think…

A friend who makes you laugh often: Liz – inside jokes are the best!

Your three best qualities:
1. If I love you I am loyal to a fault
2. I am honest (but don’t ask me if your ass looks big – that’s just not fair!)
3. I’m pretty laid-back and easy-going about almost everything

Your three worst qualities:
1. I’m impatient (Hello? House hunting?)
2. I cry – all the time. When I’m mad. When I’m frustrated. I HATE IT!
3. I am scared to venture out of my own little box

Three words/phrases that describe how others view you:
You’d have to ask them… Any “Friends of Tiffy” out there want to volunteer a word or phrase that you think describes me?

Three things for which you are often complimented on:
1. Cooking
2. My house is clean
3. Hair (Seriously, women stop me at the grocery store to find out who does the color!)

A special compliment that made you blush: A long, long time ago when TheBoy and I were in that first blush of romance and hadn’t quite defined ourselves as of yet someone asked me what he was to me. I answered “friend, lover, and roommate”. I caught him looking at me strangely later on in the evening and asked him how he would have responded, if asked the same question.* His response? “Soul mate”

The greatest amount of physical pain you have ever endured: The freak cheerleading accident of 1995. That story is a post unto itself… I’ll add it to the list of topics to blog on.

The greatest amount of emotional pain you have ever endured: Trying to break out of the me that was and into the me I wanted to be. Which included, among other things, letting go of some friends who were doing more harm than good, admitting I needed help and breaking up with a long-term boyfriend. Pretty much in that order.

Your best physical feature: I don’t know. Hair maybe? I like my laugh but I’m not sure if that’s physical?

When you really want to get to know someone, you: check out how they treat other people, including service people and wait staff and their own family.

When you are attracted to someone you: Joke with them. It usually ends me in the role of “one of the guys” though which sucks!

Your most romantic experience: Hm… I’m not so much into candle light and roses so I can’t think of anything along those lines… My favorite times with TheBoy usually involve us out at the lake or camping somewhere just me and him.

Something someone said or did that you found extremely attractive: I think passion is attractive – any kind of passion… education, political, a hobby, a sports team… Just please be passionate about something!

Something someone said or did that you found frighteningly unattractive: I dislike people that are rude for no apparent reason or who say hurtful things without thinking. I used to date a guy who was ruder than hell to waitresses, bartenders, sales people, you name it – such a turn off!

An intellectual ability you find attractive: Intellect in general is attractive but I do love it when someone can hold their own in a conversation whether it be history, literature, politics or sports.

A personality trait that you find attractive: I like people who are calm, laid back and easy going. A sense of humor doesn’t hurt either.

You are irritated when people ask you: “When are you and TheBoy getting married?”

You love it when people ask you: “Can I have this recipe?”

A type of person you don't seem to get along with: Anyone with an undue sense of entitlement. Also, people who are so set in their own opinions and beliefs that they can’t be tolerent of others.

The farthest distance you would travel now to be with someone: Hard to say… I haven’t been asked. If TheBoy suddenly got a fantastic job offer that meant he was moving away I’d go. No questions.

What you enjoy most about having a committed relationship: He knows everything there is to know about me. And he loves me anyway!

What you dislike most about having a committed relationship: Sometimes we take each other for granted. And I do miss the excitement of being new sometimes… But we try hard to keep the spark alive. Dating is important – whether it’s been 4 weeks, 4 years or 40 years.

A place where you have always wanted to do it: Um… I like to do it anywhere outside… Right now I have this fantasy about doing it off road somewhere – but that’s due to the fact that TheBoy and I just went wheeling in his Bronco! I also kind of have a small fetish about water… I like water.

*Yes, I was fishing for a compliment. I’m a girl! But I wasn’t expecting something so jaw-dropping, eye-opening, stomach-turning…

Monday, October 24, 2005

Hurry Up and Wait.

So this is my least favorite of all of the steps in the real estate process. We got pre-approved. We found a house. We made an offer. And now? Now we wait. And wonder... And hope the Seller is truly as "motivated" as their realtor thought they were and that they accept our offer.


Have a I mentioned before that patience is not my strongest virtue? It's more than half the reason I'm not sure I should procreate. Ever. I may hide it well but I am hugely impatient. It's my least favorite quality in myself. That and I cry a lot even when I desperately don't want to. I hate crying!

So what's an impatient crier to do with herself for the next 28 hours or so?!?!?

I'm taking suggestions!

Something for your Monday...

TheBoy and I looked at another house yesterday and we're really really excited! I'll keep y'all posted as things unwind... I have a good feeling about this one! Though I am trying to not get too excited. This market sucks! And I'm impatient!

Keep your fingers crossed for us!

To tide you over I thought I'd share this, courtesy of Franky.

Mood Analysis Test

Here are my results for this fine Monday morning:

You are very ambitious and because you seek and need recognition, you try in your own way to impress people and you want to be looked up to - to be both popular and admired. You feel that there is a gap which separates you from your fellow man, or woman as the case may be, but this anxiety is an unnecessary one. Keep on the way you are going and you may surprise yourself.

Always anxious to accept the role of the leader, as indeed you often work well with people - but try to stay out of the limelight. You'd like a life of ease with no one to rock the boat and someone who understands you is so important in your life.

Being a very proud individual, you tend to hold yourself aloof pretending that you are stoical - indifferent to pain and pleasure. This is not so, for in truth you are an extremely emotional individual, one that may make a hasty decision and perhaps regret it at leisure. It is time now to break the bond of detachment and be the 'you' that you would like to be - give vent to your emotions and enjoy yourself.

You are being unduly influenced by the situation that is all around you. You do not like the feeling of loneliness and whatever it is that seems to separate you from others. You know that life can be wonderful and you are anxious to experience life in all its aspects, to live it to the full. You therefore resent any restriction or limitations that are being imposed on you and you insist on going it alone.

You are trying to build up your own position and you resist all external influences. You insist that you are your own person and you will not tolerate any outside interference. Decisive and proud, you are true managerial material.

Friday, October 21, 2005

Friday Feast

Okay I'm on the band wagon...

Friday Feast #1

Do you button shirts top-to-bottom or bottom-to-top?

I don't usually button all of the buttons on a button down shirt, generally just a few in the middle. I think I button them from top to bottom though. I know I usually start with the top button (the top button that I am going to button that is - I never button the super top one - it makes me feel like I am choking!) because in most of my shirts that one poor over-worked button is the one that's holding on for dear life!

What is your favorite sandwich?

"The Works" with Smoked Turkey and Swiss on Sourdough from the Village Cheese House in Palo Alto. Sorry Lizzie, I have to agree with Michele and Shawn on this one!

What was a family project you helped work on as a child?

Family Project? Um... My "family" consisted of two people. I was involved in every project!

Main Course
When have you acted phony?

Actually, and it pains me to admit it, I probably spent most of the years between 13 and 20 acting phony. I have this desperate fear of not being good enough so I try very hard to give people what *I think* they want. Back then I went so far as to pretend I was things I wasn't - I did things I didn't like doing, hung out with people I didn't want to hang out with - all to make myself "good enough" for someone or other in my life.

But you know what? At the end of the day I still wasn't good enough for those people! I'm still kind of like that in that I really really want to be "good enough" in someone's eyes. A "good enough" friend. A "good enough" girlfriend. But I no longer act phony. What you see is what you get for the most part. As I told a friend earlier this year as to why I seem so sure of who I am - I spent a lot of years apologizing for being me. I'm done apologizing.

Do you write letters or postcards? If so, to whom?

Nope. I'm totally guilty of buying postcards on vacation and never writing or mailing them! I have been known to pump out the epic e-mail now and then though. Seriously, I could (and do) go on and on and on sometimes! I find myself apologizing for "War and Peace" sized e-mails more often than not.

Another "stolen" MeMe

What do you want to be when you grow up? Happy. And a business owner.

What celebrity would you love to meet? Umm.. I don’t really know.

Have you met any celebrities? I saw Sinbad at Bridge Bay last summer…

Do you think you'll ever get married? I don’t honestly know… I hope so.

What do you want your wedding song to be? “At Last” by Etta James or “Then You Can Tell Me Goodbye” by Neal McCoy. But of course I’d ideally chose something that had meaning to me and my future husband right?

If you could go anywhere in the world right now, where would it be? Italy or Greece

What is your favorite club? Dance club? The Saddlerack! Or I like that 80’s place… With the smiley face? Polly Esther’s?

Who is the coolest person you know? Ryan

What’s the best class you ever took? Speech 4 at Foothill – AKA Group Therapy

What's the best job you have ever had? This one is pretty high up on the list… I’ve had a bunch of super crap jobs!

Is there someone you can't stop thinking about that doesn't know it? Actually yes. Wouldn’t y’all like to know who!

Do you Love your Mom? My Mom rocks! She’s my best friend.

Do you Love your Dad? If Dad = Biological Father then I hardly know him. But I suppose I do, in some way… I don’t think I LIKE him very much though.

Do you Love your Siblings? I’m an only child – but I think *I’m* great!

What song is in your head right now? “Then You Can Tell Me Goodbye” by Neal McCoy (stupid wedding song question!)

What did you eat for breakfast this morning? A slice of pepperoni pizza – hello hangover!

Favorite Movie? Dirty Dancing

Favorite Store? Ann Taylor – not that I can afford to shop there…

Favorite City? San Antonio

Favorite Drink? Iced Tea

Favorite Alcoholic Drink? Hefeweizen

Favorite Food? Mexican

Have you ever thrown up on anyone really hot? Um no. I think the only person I’ve ever thrown up ON was my mom. Poor mom!

Have you ever been to Mexico? Yes

Do you obsess over the little things? OMG – ALL THE TIME!

What is your ethnic background? Irish, English and some other random stuff I’m sure. My last name is Italian…

Who is the hottest woman in the world? I have no friggin clue!

If you could join one band, who would it be? Lynard Skynard? I dunno I’m not much of a groupie…

If you could resurrect one band, who would it be? The Beatles

What color are your underwear right now? Um… They are kind of a brick red and tan paisley pattern

Favorite Athlete: Lance Armstrong – he’s just so inspiring

Favorite body part on girl/guy: Eyes and Lips – It’s a tie

Ideal mate should act: Like themselves. If I don’t like them for themselves (and vice versa) we’re in trouble!

What can your ideal mate NOT do: Lie to me or make me feel unimportant.

Thursday, October 20, 2005

On life after death...

Those of you who also read Kate's blog have probably already seen and contributed to her discussion yesterday on spirits, angels and whether or not there is life after death. I bet Kate had no idea how much her post was going to touch people!

I just could not stop thinking about this yesterday! Or this morning for that matter... Funny how timing works too. Driving home from work last night I was listening to the radio and they played the new Brooks and Dunn song "I Believe". A few of the lyrics just stopped me in my tracks:

I can't quote the book
The chapter or the verse
You can't tell me it all ends
In a slow ride in a hearse
You know I'm more and more convinced
The longer that I live
Yeah, this can't be
No, this can't be
No, this can't be all there is

Coincidence? Or maybe it's just that everyone has been thinking and questioning lately. Between the terrorism, the natural disasters and the illness I know I for one have been brought face to face with thoughts of my own mortality lately.

It seems I've moved on from that invincible feeling of youth into something more. Something that makes me take into account the outcome of my actions. And of my inactions. I've always said that I never wanted to end my life with something left unsaid or undone. I think it's why I almost always end conversations with my mother in "I love you" and why I spend a great deal of time thinking up ways to express to my friends and loved ones how much they truly mean to me.

And while I'm at it I'll give you the three little words that *I* live by.

"Actions Speak Louder."

And y'all? They do.

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

Sin 5 - Divinity

Hello friends of Tiffy. And IIF's too!

If anyone is in the Bay Area this weekend and is looking for something to do and want to help out a good cause on Saturday night come check out Sin 5. The theme this year is Divinity and I'm sure it will not disappoint.

Teresa is the hostess with the mostest. I can't believe it but this will actually be my first Sin! I seem to always be traveling when they occur but this year I'm there y'all.

Here's the link if anyone is interested:

Your $20 donation goes completely to the Northern California Innocence Project and buys you all the booze your little heart desires. $20 more will get you salsa lessons for an hour before the festivities get under way.

Speaking of the Northern California Innocence Project, LawyerSean (aka: DJSean) forwarded me this information about a show they are hosting. I'm planning on attending so if anyone wants to meet there (or go out for food/cocktails after) let me know.

Hey guys! In a week from this coming Thursday "Barred From Life" is coming to the Mountain View Center for the Performing Arts. The play highlights the issue of wrongful conviction by examining the lives of the exonerees. It is a combination of dance, music, and video, with a video-performance by Danny Glover. Afterwards there will be a Q&A session with John Stoll, Delbert Tibbs and other exonerees. It would be fantastic if you guys could come. It's free and open to the public, so please invite anyone else you can.

The details:
When: Thursday, October 27th @ 7:30pm
Where: Mountain View Center for Performing Arts
Admission: FREE

Courtesy of Cana

So I might have a small problem with MySpace... No need for an intervention or anything but... It turns out I just love reading random stuff about people! I love it! All the little "20 questions" things and the "getting to know me" things. I love them all!

Because we've already discussed the fact that I will tag myself from other people's blogs right? Yes, I am that kind of Crazy! In fact I just remembered another MeMe I saw that I want to do... But I digress.

Cana posted this thing on MySpace. So I decided I should answer it. Here.


I know y'all are just too excited for words!

What is your occupation? Mortgage Sales Associate

What color is your underwear? Pink!

What are you listening to right now? My office mates chatting

What was the last thing you ate? A butter croissant! It’s okay I went to boot camp this morning!

If you were a crayon, what color would you be? Pink!

How is the weather right now? Kind of cloudy

What kind of music do you like to listen to? Country, 80’s, Dance, Jazz, Oldies, Old School R&B… pretty much anything actually.

Last person you spoke to on the phone? Anther banker and my former manager Rob. He called me “girlfriend”… It was weird.

Do you like the person who sent this to you? I stole this from Cana on MySpace and of course I like her… I wish I knew her better but I USED to really like her and I’m sure she’s only improved with age!

How old are you today? 26

Favorite drink? Right now it’s coffee… Friggin’ boot camp!

Favorite sport to watch? Baseball. Followed closely by Football and Hockey. But I’m a sports junkie… I’ll watch anything!

Have you ever dyed your hair? Yep.

Do you wear contacts or glasses? Only to read

Pets? 1 very spoiled, rather big boned cat named Bator. He’s my baby!

Favorite month? April

Favorite food? Mexican!

Last movie watched? Um… I TRIED to watch Sahara last night but I fell asleep. Same for Kung FU Hustle on Saturday. I’d have to say it was probably Guess Who.

Favorite day of the year? Christmas!

What do you do to vent anger? run

What was your favorite toy as a child? Molly or Stitch (a doll and a teddy bear – I still have them both)

Fall or Spring? Spring

Hugs or kisses? Hugs

Cherry or Blueberry? Cherry

Living arrangements? 2 bedroom / 1 bath apartment in the Ghetto with TheBoy and TheCat

When was the last time you cried? Thank GOD I can’t think of it… Um… I have no idea! Yea me!

What's on the floor of your closet? Shoes, shoes and more shoes… Also, a bag of fingernail polish and manicure/pedicure stuff

Who is the friend you have had the longest? Angie – I think it’s been like 13 years now…

What did you do last night? Shopped for Halloween costume stuff, fed a friend’s cats, cooked dinner, attempted to watch Sahara, passed out early.

What inspires you? My mother, sunshine, progress, good in other people

What are you afraid of? Not being good enough

Plain, cheese or spicy hamburgers? Cheese

Favorite car? I love my car! Chevy Z24 convertible. I also love Ry’s 73 Ford Bronco and my next car will either be a Ford T-Bird or one of those new Mustangs.

Favorite dog breed? Lab, German Shepard, Dalmation

Number of keys on your key ring? 6

How many years at your current job? 1, next month.

Favorite day of the week? Sunday

How many states / countries have you lived in? 1 country, 5 states

How many cities have you lived in? oh my… I could never count them all! Let me try… 2 + 1 + 1 + 2 + 8 = 14 maybe?

What is your passion? Funny question… I don’t know if I’m “passionate” about any of these things but I’ll say cooking/food, running/exercise and being a good daughter/friend/girlfriend.

What do you enjoy doing on weekends? Being outside, sleeping in, reading

What high school did you go too? M-A

What do you miss most about high school? I’m supposed to miss it? I guess I miss the fact that school was all I had to worry about, there was no rent or bills and food just MAGICALLY appeared in the cupboards. I worked then because I WANTED to, not because I NEEDED to and paying my car payment and insurance was FUN because driving and having a car was FUN, not a NECESSITY.

Adventures in House Hunting - Part 3

I know it's been AGES since I last posted on this topic... But y'all this is getting frustrating! In fact TheBoy and I are mildly guilty of not really looking these past few weekends the way we should be. But it's certainly disenchanting for someone, such as myself, who has been in the real estate field here in Silicon Valley for ages. I can't even imagine how frustrated TheBoy must be with only me and his Mom for hesitant guidance and education.

Never-the-less, I do want to share with you guys the story of the place we bid on in Sunnyvale. We got ahold of this listing via a posting on CL from a realtor looking to represent a buyer on the property. Unfortunately this was merely a day before we left for a long weekend at Oroville. I did manage to get in touch with the realtor who had posted the CL ad and got some details from him. Tear down or fixer upper. Needs extensive work. Listed at $430,000. Offers on Tuesday. Your standard stuff. We were pretty excited!

I mean it sounded like just what we were looking for. Needs work? Bring it on! I'd rather design my own floor plans and such anyway. And with an architect in the family... No problem! $430,000 fit nicely into our budget also. Even if we factored in a couple other offers. We thought we had room. This could work! So we thought about it, and talked about it, the whole time we were in Oroville. Maybe this would be the one!

Fast forward to Monday... We're back from Oroville. We're off work. I've put in numerous calls to the original agent who I talked to before leaving but haven't heard anything back yet. I figure he's found another buyer to represent and doesn't want conflict. TheBoy thinks he's just rude. Either way we decide to drive by and check it out. Offers are the next morning - let's see if we want to get into this.

My only thoughts on driving through the neighborhood are "well it could be worse". The street it's on is a frontage road to a fairly busy expressway but it's at least on the other side of the street (backyard doesn't but directly up to the retaining wall). The houses are all little Burke and Wyatt type, Eichler-esque numbers but most of them are well maintained. Could be worse.

We pull into the driveway and there is another couple there taking a look around. From the driveway you can't really get a good impression. The first thing TheBoy notices is that the garage has been converted into a room. There is no garage door, only a solid wall with a funky plexi-glass "window". We then walk up to the front door. First thing I notice? All the glass in the windows is broken. In fact, on closer inspection I think there were maybe 6 panes of glass intact in the whole building. From the broken front windows we can see half pulled up carpet, walls with holes (that look suspiciously fist-sized) and tons and tons of garbage. And graffiti.

We walk around to the side yard (the place was wide open - clearly the owner's hadn't been there in ages and we weren't too worried about getting into trouble for trespassing) to check out what the realtor had called a "not to code additional room". Right. This "room" was made out of something suspiciously resembling plywood. Seriously y'all. And it wasn't quite standing upright. Also there were more broken windows.

Around back shows us more broken windows, more graffiti, and more garbage. But also a HUGE rear yard! Jackpot! It's amazing how a large piece of land will make up for almost anything in a house... A quick view of the other side reveals nothing spectacular. But of course there were, you guessed it, more broken windows!

Needless to say, I was more than a bit discouraged by the physical inspection but... A deal is a deal and this is Silicon Valley we're talking about here. We decided to go for it. The next morning I got in touch with a realtor friend of mine to see if she would call the listing agent to scope out the situation for me and perhaps draw up an offer.

A few minutes later I get phone calls from both the realtor and BestFriend Liz wanting to know if I am crazy as the comps show that this house is worth WAY MORE than the listing price! A quick explanation of the status of said home has them both mildly reassured though quite possibly thinking I am MORE crazy than they could have ever guessed!


Are y'all ready for the clincher?

Because of course there is one right?

No one's been invited to a house warming at ChezGhetto in Sunnyvale complete with black garbage bag and duct tape covered windows and space heaters.

And it's not that I don't WANT to invite you over to enjoy my space heater, duct tape and garbage bags! Y'all know I would absolutely be throwing a bash. Right?


So... You want to know what happened?

12 offers happened. Yes. I said 12. As in T-W-E-L-V-E. For those that thought they heard me wrong.

That means 11 more people/couples/corporations? decided that $430,000 was WAY too low of a price for that fine gem in Sunnyvale. I wonder how much it ended up going for. My guess is somewhere between $550,000 and $600,000. But I really don't have any clue.

How can a girl (and boy) compete with such Craziness! I mean clearly we both have The Crazy. But these people are PROFESSIONAL with The Crazy.

Or they are desperate. As we are quickly becoming.

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

Welcome to the Incredible Shrinking Appetite!

I'm not quite sure how this is happening... I don't know if it has to do with all of the boot camp / pre-triathlon training stuff I've been doing. Or maybe the fact that I am truly happy and content for the first time in ages (because y'all KNOW I am one of those "emotional eaters" right?). Anyway, the cause is unknown but the effect is FANTASTIC!

Seriously. Today I had my FAVORITE thing ever from the Greek restaurant across from my office. I usually will devour the entire plate of food - it's so friggin good! Today? Today I didn't even make it through 1/2 of my meal before I felt so full I was nauseous. Odd...

Sunday? My food intake on Sunday consisted of a 7 layer burrito from Taco Bell, half a dozen deep fried artichoke hearts and 3 bites of German potato salad. That's it! All day! AND I walked around at a festival all day. AND I worked out.

And I've noticed my appetite's been getting smaller and smaller and smaller over the last few months... I wonder if there is some sort of scientific explanation for this? Is there something in particular I am doing that's causing this?

Because clearly I want to keep doing it!

Ah the joys of MySpace

I know this is a teensy bit mean. I do. And rest assured that any legitimate attempts to reach me through MySpace are answered with honesty and excitement. I truly LOVE getting back in touch with people I haven't spoken to in ages. It's like everything in my life is "new" again when you're sharing it with someone for the first time. Y'all know.

But this morning I got the following message from "a Dutch admire"* who writes:

Greeting from Holland
Hope all is ok there
Dont be afraid that I am from Holland, we dont bite
Hmm who I am oops sorry
How can I forget to introduce myself
Well as i said I am from Holland raised and born in Amsterdam.
So if I make some mistakes in English, please forgive me
My mothertongue is Dutch,
I am 35 and working as a electrician.
I really enjoy it, special because its so much different problems you see each day.
My hobbies are sport, I practice myself Karate and Jiu Jitsu
But dont be afraid I am not a Sylvester Stallone type (He is much shorter then I am hehehe).
Then I love to ride on my motor. Love to travel
Been around the whole world
Australie, New Zealand, Singapore, Alaska, Canada, West coast US, East coast US, Mexico, Israel, Egypt and a lot in Europe ofcourse.
Well before I really start to bore you I say bye for now
I really hope to hear from you.
A big kiss from Holland

Clearly I haven't changed any of the grammar or anything so that y'all can get the full effect. And I am not using his name. It feels less mean that way.

So my first thought on receiving this was along the lines of "how sweet - apparently there is no Dutch translation for in a relationship." So I did what any normal girl would do (unless we're on Friendster... evil Friendster with the tracking!) I clicked on the link to his profile.

Now. Apparently this guy is a pro at the propositioning of American women. He's got loads of "friends" on his profile. All of them women. Most of them sporting pictures of themselves in various states of undress. Some of them are down right naked.


What is the world coming to? Can't a girl receive a nice e-mail from a man in another country who just wants to chat? Apparently not. Or at least not in this case. This guy clearly is interested in sharing pictures (of the nude variety), possible naughty messages and ultimately he wants to come "visit" you to "take care of any needs". Also to "pursue a relationship". Does this sound like this guy needs a green card? Anyone?

Sadly there were also tons of comments on his profile from these various women... They seem to be eating it up! Must be lots of bored housewives or something. I guess I can't judge too much though. I DID spend several minutes looking around his profile myself! It was like a train wreck y'all!

*his typo not mine

Monday, October 17, 2005

Weekend Recap

1 Happy Hour at Ugly's with Carrie, Ryan, Angie and Erik
3 Dirty Martinis drank at Happy Hour
1 Jaeger Blaster at Happy Hour
1 drunken conversation with Erik about how wonderful Angie is
$150 spent on new brake pads and rotors (whatever the hell those are)
1 ticket purchased for Brooks and Dunn concert on Thursday!
1 fried egg sandwich prepared by TheBoy Friday night
1 trip to the Saddle Rack with Carrie
2 shots of Jaeger drank at Saddle Rack
1 kamikaze shot drank at Saddle Rack
4 Coors Lights drank at Saddle Rack
2 cowboys danced with
1 boy who followed me outside to tell me that he thought he loved me
4 songs I managed to get Carrie to dance to
1 line dance I remembered enough to attempt
1 awesome TheBoy who came to pick up a very drunk me and Carrie at the Saddle Rack
1 trip to Jack in the box with Carrie and TheBoy at 2 am
1 killer hang over Saturday morning!
4 hours spent being a good daughter with my Mom and Angie
$20 spent in gas to go be a good daughter
34 gallons of iced tea drank, approximately
1 sugar free Rockstar provided by Liz
1 dinner at Benihana's with TheBoy and Liz Saturday night
1 large sake drank at dinner
1 trip to Ugly's with Liz, TheBoy, Sean and Brett Saturday night
0 drinks had by Tiffy at Ugly's on Saturday
1 trip to Oktoberfest in Campbell on Sunday
3 pints of beer drank at Oktoberfest
1 Snake Bite had at Katie Blooms after Oktoberfest
1 order of deep fried artichoke hearts shared with Carrie and TheBoy
3 bites of German Potato Salad stolen from TheBoy's plate
1 trip to Home Depot to return pressure washer given to TheBoy for our anniversary in June
1 trip to OSH for God knows what
1 7 layer burrito purchased at Taco Bell for dinner
1 very, very tired and exhausted Tiffy by Sunday night!

Friday, October 14, 2005

Do you act your age?

Well I'm 26 and this thing says I'm 28. Though I am the baby of my group of friends. So... I guess this is okay?

You Are 28 Years Old

Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe.

13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world.

20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences.

30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more!

40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

Thursday, October 13, 2005

It's time for a 12 step program y'all

Prompted by a post here about things that people can not live without, I have done a little research (thank you Google) and found that my little "addiction" may actually be more serious than I thought!*

Check it out! This is what I found at Lip Balm Anonymous.

Lip Balm Anonymous Self-Test for Lip Balm Addiction

1) Do you ever use more lip balm than you planned?
I never limit myself to a planned amount of Chapstick!

2) Has the use of lip balm interfered with your job?
Not unless leaving work to go buy it across the street at Walgreens is "interfering"

3) Is your lip balm use causing conflict with your spouse or family?

4) Do you feel depressed, guilty, or remorseful after you use lip balm?

5) Do you use whatever lip balm you have almost continuously until the supply is exhausted?

6) Do you ever wish that you had never taken that first application or hit of lip balm?

7) Do you have an obsession to get lip balm when you don't have it?
I have occasionally made TheBoy go out of our way to find me a store if I realize I don't have any Chapstick with me.

8) Are you experiencing financial difficulties due to your lip balm use?

9) Do you experience an anticipation high just knowing you are about to use lip balm?
Actually yes!

10) Without using lip balm, do you have difficulty sleeping without taking a drink or another drug?
Well I don't know about the drink part - but I can not fall asleep if my lips are dry

11) Are you absorbed with the thought of getting coated even while interacting with a friend or loved one?

12) Have you begun to use lip balm while alone?
OMG - All the time!

13) Do your lips, nose, or other areas hurt when you avoid Lip Balm?
Well of course!

14) Do you ever have feelings that people are talking about you or watching you?
Is it because of the Chapstick?!?!?!

15) Do you use larger doses of lip balm to get the same protection you once experienced?

16) Have you tried to quit or cut down on your lip balm use only to find that you couldn't?

17) Have any of your friends or family suggested that you may have a problem?
Yes! But they don't understand...

18) Have you ever lied to or misled those around you about how much or how often you use?

19) Do you use lip balm in your car, at work, in the bathroom, on airplanes, or other public places?
Every day!

20) Do you occasionally coat heavily after a disappointment, quarrel or rough day?

21) When under pressure, do you always use more heavily than usual?

22) Can you handle more lip balm now than when you first started using?

23) When using with others, do you try to have a few extra coats when they won't know it?

24) Are there certain occasions when you feel uncomfortable if lip balm is not available?
I DO sort of feel panicky if I don't have any and don't think there is anyplace near by where I can get some...

25) When you start using, are you in more of a hurry to get the first hit than you used to be?

26) Are you secretly irritated when friends or family discuss your lip balm use?

27) Do you usually have a reason for occasions when you use heavily?
Um... chapped lips?

28) Have you tried to control your lip balm use by switching brands or following different plans?
I have dabbled a bit with Burt's Bees...

29) Have you often failed to keep promises about controlling your lip balm?

30) Have you tried to control your lip balm use by changing jobs or moving?

31) Do you try to avoid family or friends while using?

32) Are you having an increasing number of financial and work problems?

33) Do more people seem to be treating you unfairly without reason?
Yes! But I thought that was from the blonde hair! Who would have thought it was the Chapstick this whole time!

34) Have you ever decided to stop using for a week or so, but only lasted for a couple of days?
Only once or twice have I entertained such crazy talk!

35) Do you wish people would mind their own business about your lip balm use--stop telling you what to do?

36) Is lip balm affecting your reputation?

37) Do you crave lip balm at a definite time daily?

Oh yeah!

38) Does lip balm cause you to have difficulty sleeping?
Only if I go to bed without it - which I would never be so foolish as to do!

39) Have you ever been to a hospital or institution on account of lip balm?

40) Are you afraid that if you stop using lip balm your work will suffer or you will lose your energy, motivation, or confidence? How can one be energized, motivated or confident with icky chapped, dry and cracking lips? Honestly!

41) Do you spend time with people or in places you otherwise would not be around but for the availability of lip balm?

42) Have you ever stolen lip balm or money from friends or family?
Maybe once or twice... But I clearly needed it more than them!

43) Can you apply lip balm with one hand?
Like it's hard?

If you have answered Yes to any of these questions, you may have a lip balm dependency problem.

Can y'all see? Do you see that I am Crazy? And Addicted! If fact I'm even sitting with a little tub of Burt's Bees on my desk right now. And I have 1 tube of Chapstick, 2 different shades of lip gloss and a random vanilla scented lip balm in my purse less than 2 feet away!

Why hello Dr. What is that nice white coat for anyway?

*Just in case the sarcasm isn't coming through clearly via the Internets - this post is very tongue in cheek - please don't be concerned!

Gotta love them Texans!

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Pepper Spray. Or why Men should NOT sneak up on Women.

TheBoy bought me pepper spray a few years ago when I took up running again. I guess he figured the risk of me spraying myself with pepper spray was sufficiently low in relation to the risk of me being attacked while running.

He of course felt no qualms what-so-ever about moving me into the scary neighborhood we live in now... Because it has a 2 car garage. 2 whole cars! *sigh* He didn't even seem overly concerned when I got stopped by a police officer as I was getting out of my car who politely informed me that he wished me and my friend would not run around the neighborhood after dark.

So I have started getting into the habit of carrying the stupid pepper spray. Not all the time, mind. Just when I'm walking by myself to the gym. Or when I'm walking out to the car at 5:00 am on my way to boot camp. You know. It just makes me feel better.

(I realize that the "feeling better" is arbitrary and probably wrong. I do.)

This morning I almost sprayed some poor guy!

But seriously. Men - DO NOT sneak up on unsuspecting women in the dark. You have been warned. There I was rumaging in my trunk for something, minding my own business when I heard a male voice say "excuse me". Now I realize that excuse me is a polite thing to say. But male voices coming from within feet of me, for the most part, are TERRIFYING in the dark.

Luckily I still had the pepper spray in hand. I spun around with my heart hammering and my finger on the trigger fully prepared to do battle for my honor when I came face to face with a terrified middle aged man in jogging shorts. I don't know what it is about men in jogging shorts that just make them look so... vulnerable. Seriously, I think the guy almost crapped in his pants. I could practically SEE his life flashing in front of his eyes!

I think I scared us both! Anywho. I finally acknowledged his question and managed to answer calmly. Though I did keep a tight grip on the pepper spray and a thumb firmly on the trigger until he left. I don't think that guy understands how close he came to excruciating and searing pain. I saw Jackass. I know that shit has GOT to be painful!

So men out there - be warned. We women these days are ARMED and DANGEROUS!

Also, you probably shouldn't sneak up on us. Ever.

20 Questions... Plus 5.

I am totally stealing this from Kate. Because, y'all know, I LOVE doing these silly tag things. I think I sometimes learn more about ME by doing them than I learn about my friends who do them... Does that make sense?

1. How old were you when you found out Santa was not a jolly man, but your mom and dad?
You know I can't recall if I ever did believe Santa was real... No memories of trying to stay up late to "catch" him. I think maybe because we lived in an apartment with no fireplace most of my early years. Hmm... I'll have to ask my mom.

2. Who was the first celebrity's poster you had hanging on your wall?
Oh gosh - how embarrassingg is THIS! I'm pretty sure it was New Kids on the Block! Torn from a Tiger Beat type magazine no less! I don't remember if it was the whole group or only Joey. He was my favorite. Love those baby blues!

3. How many times have you heard the phrase, "Please step out of the car Ma'am/Sir."
Only once. About 6 months ago. It was my second sobriety check in less than an hour too! I had been up in SF at a Bachelorette party of sorts with some friends and was the DD. I had just dropped off the majority of the party at BestFriend Liz's when I got pulled over the first time. Luckily, I had the bride in the car still and I think the cop was so entertained by her (SHE was WASTED) he just gave me a perfunctory test. After I dropped the bride off I got pulled over the second time only 2 or 3 blocks from my house! That cop actually made me get out of the car but once I told him I'd already been pulled over (less than an hour before and less than a 1/2 mile away!) he let me go. Sucked though because my feet were killing me and I REALLY didn't want to put my shoes back on to get out of the car! Also I wasn't even remotely drunk! I'd had 1 shot at the beginning of the evening which was like 6 or 7 hours earlier! But I suppose driving at 4 am IS suspicious...

4. What is the lamest reason for breaking up with someone you have ever given or received?
"God told me to." I was the receiver. And no, sadly, I'm not kidding.

5. What is the dumbest lie you ever told your parents to get out of something?
I blamed all early drunken escapades on food poisoning... Though clearly I must have smelled like a distillery.

6. Paper or Plastic?
What are we talking here? Bags? Money? I SHOULD get paper bags at the grocery store but I don't always. Those little plastic ones are so much easier to carry! But I do reuse them! And I prefer to carry my ATM or credit cards instead of cash. I don't know why. Something in the back of my head tells me I spend less that way.

7. What did you want to be when you grew up when you were little (under 10)?
A ballerina or a professional cowgirl. Yeah. That's what Texas will do to young children y'all.

8. What do you want to be now?
RETIRED! LOL - Kidding. Well sort of... Comfortable. And Happy.

9. What kind and color of underwear do you have on right now?
Pink and White stripped V-String. With a matching bra. Yes I am THAT kind of crazy.

10. What CD are you ashamed to admit you own and listen to?
Most of my really embarrassing stuff is on tape actually. I probably just dated myself didn't I? Keep in mind, Texas y'all. I own every Britney Spears CD except the greatest hits one she released last year. AND I know all the words to ALL the songs. Um... And I have a Backstreet Boys CD - but that belonged to my ex. I'm not sure how I ended up with it actually.

11. Who would you sleep with if you had the opportunity?
I'm going to suspend reality here for a minute because anyone who knows me even remotely knows I feel VERY STRONGLY about fidelity. I don't cheat. Won't cheat. Never. Comes from being cheated on A LOT I suppose. But I won't climb up on THAT soap box here. So. If I were single... I would probably sleep with Matt Damon given the opportunity. He'd have to be single also though. What's good for the goose and so forth...

12. Finish this sentence and say what movie this is from. The FBI is going to pay me to _________?
I have no friggin clue! This is a question for BestFriend Liz.

13. Are you a lame asshole who lied on the above question?
Nope. But I did Google the answer...

14. Why did you come to the blog that tagged you?
Funny. I have no idea. Any friends of Tiffy out there want to claim responsibility for me blog-stalking Kate?

15. What is your biggest fear?
Not being good enough.

16. Do you watch reality television and why or why not?
NO. Not since the first Survivor about a million years ago. Oh and I watched Joe Millionaire. He was HOT! Wait. Before I expose myself as a terrible liar... I am addicted to American Idol. But I don't lump that in with all those Fear Factor or Bachelorette type shows... Totally not the same!

17. Have you ever slept with someone and wondered why the hell you did that?
Yep. One of those "maybe my Ex and I could just be fuck buddies" moments. Clearly we could not.

18. What is your biggest regret?
Wow. I'd have to say I regret losing touch with old friends. I regret that a lot. But I don't know how to fix it. Or if I even would really want to.

19. How old were you and what happened the first time you got drunk?
LOL. Man this brings back some old memories... And some more of that regret crap from above... I was, let's see, maybe 15? Definitely not driving yet. I had skipped school with my friend Jen and my boyfriend at the time picked us up in his Jeep CJ and we went to his parent's house and drank a crap load of whiskey and rum that he had gotten from his job.* All I remember is us sitting in his bedroom and all of a sudden Jen tells him to bring her a bucket quick. He hesitated for less than a second and she threw up all over his carpet! I mean ALL OVER! Then at some point he drove us home. And I told my mom that both Jen and I had gotten food poisoning at Burger King. For years after that I had to pretend I didn't like Burger King when secretly a Whopper Junior with Cheese is my favorite fast food thing of all time!

20. Which would you rather be, the hammer or the nail?
The Hammer. I'd like to be the driving force behind change, not just a follower along.

21. What is your favorite curse word?
Fuck. But seriously y'all I have got to cut down on the cussing! I'm thinking about instituting one of those quarter jars where you have to give someone a quarter everytime you cuss.

22. If there was one thing you could ask your parents, but never had the guts, what would that be?
What on earth did my wonderful Mother see in that horrible excuse I call biological Father?!?!

23. What are three things that make you go Hmmm?
Mullets, makeup on men (not stage makeup) and hot women with ugly or old men.

24. Real or fake boobies?
Either. So long as they look fabulous! And proportional.

25. Do you like being tagged by people?
Yep. So much so that I tag myself from other people's blogs! I'm a geek. We know this. And we love me anyway. Right?

*I'm not providing his name or details because I don't want to get him into trouble. Also, I was fantastically horrible to him as a girlfriend and I'm embarrassed now.

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Tiffany Needs...

This has totally kept me entertained as I sit here eating my lunch! Some make more sense than others but... Here you go!

If you want to try this go to Google and type in "(your name) needs" and scroll through. Enjoy!

Tiffany needs... to pose in the nude again
(presumably from the Tiffany Playboy Pictorial last year? Which I totally kept BTW!)

Tiffany needs... more fans
(who doesn't?)

Tiffany needs... Chucky to artificially inseminate Jennifer
(from Bride of Chucky.)

Tiffany needs... to take a lesson from the dog
(which would mean I need to have a dog... Right?)

Tiffany needs... to build a machine that will defeat the Leather Goddesses
(I like the sound of Leather Goddesses. I don't think I want to defeat them.)

Tiffany needs... medical marijuana
(um... No comment?)

Tiffany needs... her hair washed
Tiffany needs... Diamonds!
Tiffany needs... to be one on one
Tiffany needs... a ditch day
Tiffany needs... to communicate
Tiffany needs... to lose weight
Tiffany needs... a new challenge
Tiffany needs... a little help taking a bath


OMG! I am finally back from Vegas and what a trip it was! So so SO fun y'all! I love that town! Needless to say I doubt I can do a full weekend recap because... well... I can't exactly remember the entire weekend! But here goes my attempt:

1 game of darts Thursday night
2 large sake divided among 3 people
6 pieces of assorted sushi
1 beer (I know - I was the driver)
1 belated birthday celebration for Angie! Happy Birthday Angie!
1 early flight out to Vegas
1 greasy Burger King breakfast in preparation of Vegas weekend
1 (very strong) rum and coke provided by TheBoy in flight
1 lost reservation at the hotel
15 beers drank Friday, approximately
5 sugar free Red Bulls drank Friday
4 casinos explored
2 hours of penny/nickel slots played
1 late late night arrival of BestFriend Liz
$20 lost on roulette (Stupid Black!)
1 hour friends slept locked out of hotel room
1 upgrade to awesome suite for friends
1 greasy CoCo breakfast Saturday morning post-hangover
1 happy hour (at 2pm) with Charlie and Rhonda at Mandalay Bay
3 rum and cokes drank at happy hour #1
2 hours spent at "the beach" at Mandalay Bay courtesy of Charlie and Rhonda
2 shots of tequila consumed at happy hour #2
3 beers drank getting ready for evening
1 martini at dinner
1 very sick Tiffy Saturday night
1 time our flight was over booked
$300 in flight vouchers for giving up seats on over booked flight
1 free night stay in Vegas
10 casinos TheBoy drug me to on our "free night" in Vegas, roughly
2 hours of penny slots played
5 $1 Michelob beers drank by TheBoy
1 $1 Michelob beer it took for me to decide I don't like Michelob
1 $12 martini ( I DO like martinis!)
1 awesome Mexican food dinner
1 free breakfast on Monday
90 minutes spent on bus getting to Fremont Street with the most awesome driver ever!
1 hour spent wandering around Fremont Street
1 very LONG line at check in at the airport Monday
1 very large beer at airport on Monday after making it through line!
1 bus ride to the train station in San Jose
1 train ride to Mountain View
1 awesome BestFriendLiz who picked us up at train station in Mountain View
1 super exhausted Tiffy and TheBoy
1 super fun trip to Vegas!

I know I'm forgetting loads and loads of details but I think I'm still sobering up! I promise to provide filler details and photos later... At least I made it to boot camp this morning!

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

This is my 100th Post!!

The century mark! How exciting! Does this mean I'm an official blogger now? Or just that I have too much time on my hands? Or maybe that the voices in my head speak so loudly that I have to write this crap down somewhere?

Whatever. Yay me! 100 Posts!

(Wish I had something fantastic and exciting to blog about...)

Anywho... Only 2 more days until Vegas! I am so ready for this vacation! Between the massive, immense, life draining, all consuming work*, the illnesses, the stress of The Dream versus The Reality and the Insomnia... I NEED A VACATION! I'm just saying, is all.

And it's a sad state of affairs over here y'all. I have a papercut. On my tongue! Stupid envelopes... And I only have half a thumbnail on my left hand due to a freak salsa making accident. Also, I am still a bit, er..., saddle sore from biking on Saturday.

I know, I know. Bitch, bitch, bitch.

But at least I have Vegas to look forward to! In fact the rest of this week isn't looking so shabby either. Tonight's agenda includes laundry, wine and more of the latest Diana Gabaldon book. Tomorrow is technically my Friday at work - which is ALWAYS a cause for celebration. Tomorrow night TheBoy and I are heading up to The City for a little belated birthday partying with a friend of his from college. And Friday? Friday we leave for Vegas!

Hide the Patron y'all, Tiffy is stocking up on the RedBull! Wahoo!

Of course, you know what happens after Vegas? After Vegas I have to actually sit down and look at The Future. And make plans. Also, decisions. About The Future.


But, as my heroine Scarlett would say, "I can't think about that now. I'll think about it tomorrow**. After all, tomorrow is another day."

*Hypothetical work I mean. Of course.

**Or in my case, Monday.

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

Zucchini and Pineapple Muffins

I know this is sort of a filler post but I'm still trying to wrap my head around the subject of my post from yesterday afternoon. I promise more details coming soon...

In the meantime, last night I was playing around with a new recipe* and came up with pretty fantastic results. So here's the recipe... Let me know if any of you try it and like it. Also, anyone in the Bay Area can swing by and pick some up if they'd like...

3 eggs
2 cups sugar
2 tsp. vanilla
2 cups zucchini, grated and drained very well
1 cup chopped pineapple, drained very well
3 cups flour
2 tsp. cinnamon
1 tsp. ground nutmeg
1 tsp. salt
1 1/2 tsp. baking soda
1 tsp. baking powder
1 cup chopped nuts, optional

To do:
Beat the 3 eggs in a large bowl. Add sugar and vanilla and mix until combined well. Add the zucchini and pineapple (NOTE: make sure you DRAIN these things VERY WELL - otherwise you'll end up with VERY runny batter!).

In a separate bowl combine the dry ingredients. Fold into wet mixture. Add nuts if desired.

For muffins I used baking cups - for loaves you should oil and flour the pans prior to adding the batter. Makes about 24 muffins or, I would imagine, 2 regular loaf pans.

Turn the over on to 325 - DO NOT PREHEAT. Bake muffins 18 - 20 minutes or until toothpick inserted in center comes out clean. Loaves will take longer, like 40 - 45 minutes.

So yummy! Could have stood for a bit more pineapple flavor, but I LOVE pineapple so that's just me. I was generous with the seasonings. Perfect use for the roughly 19 tons of zucchini Michele brought over last month!

*New = new to me not that I single handedly came up with this recipe on my own. It's sort of a conglomeration of two or three recipes I had on hand.

Monday, October 03, 2005

A Day Dream Believer...

So here are the questions of the day...

If you had a choice between the job of your dreams and a fantastic job that you love, but most certainly did not dream of when you were a child, which would you chose?

What if I told you one came with job security and benefits and all of that jazz and the other most certainly didn't?

What if you'd been waiting for years to gain entry into one job and your whole life for a shot at the other?

And how about if you are perfectly qualified and suited to one job and would be flying by the seat of your pants and learning day by day at the other?

What if one job meant you'd have to postpone another dream - the dream of owning a home?

What if you were scared to death to make a change but at the same time scared to death not to?

Please someone offer me some insight?

Weekend Recap

I'm totally stealing this format from other blogs that I *stalk* which are here and here. Thanks ladies!

4 shots of tequila Friday night in honor of the birthday girl
5 beers drank Friday night
1 game of Cranium played
1 game of drunken quarters played after the Cranium game which I barely remember
2 pictures taken of drunk birthday girl snuggling with her hubby (that I don't remember taking!)
1 meeting with person regarding opening a restaurant
10 hours spent obsessing over decision to open a restaurant or not, estimated
1 nasty cut on finger from thinking about restaurant as opposed to knife placement
6 hours of sleep Friday night
4 miles biked on Saturday, up and down hills no less
1 wine tasting on Saturday
45,812 calories consumed on Saturday, roughly
5 tequila shots on Saturday night
10 beers on Saturday
1 time I cried
3 times I told everyone within earshot that I LOVED LOVED LOVED TheBoy
1 game of Cranium played then quickly abandoned due to drunkenness of participants
2 pieces of Bananas Foster that I tried for the first time ever! YUM!
3 times I got called the "Game Nazi" on Sunday morning
1 breakfast eaten with TheBoy's family after night of drunkenness above
2 trips to Orchard Supply Hardware
3 hours spent totally absorbed in the new Diana Gabaldon book
0 drinks had on Sunday - serious need to detox
1 farmers market missed
2 trips to organic produce stands looking for Italian Sweet Peppers
1 recipe made without Italian Sweet Peppers substituting interesting variety of other peppers found at stand #2


Crazy weekend! More later...