I was going to start this post by asking if any of you (all three readers) have ever had one of those days where you probably should have just stayed in bed but instead you ignored your good sense and insisted on plodding through an increasingly bad day. But then I thought that was pretty much a rhetorical question because I don’t know anyone who HASN’T had one of those days. Kind of like the day I am having today for example.
This morning I slept through my alarm because even though I went through all the trouble of setting a recurring alarm in my cell phone for 5 am every week day so I could get up and go to the gym, I somehow forgot that I left my phone plugged in to the charger in the other room. So did I wake up at 5 am and drag my ass to the gym? Sadly no. I woke up somewhere around 6:30 and, realizing it was WAY too late to salvage any pre-work gym time, promptly went back to sleep. Which means that I was running late for work this morning – super! That, added to the fact that I am a HUGE FAT ASS and will resemble something akin to the stay puff marshmallow man at my wedding that is ONE MONTH FROM TODAY and I was already wondering at the wisdom of leaving the house.
Turns out leaving the house was going to be one more item on the “could this day get any worse” list. As most of you gathered from my post below, our home was broken into a few weeks ago. Among the things stolen were all the spare keys to our cars and the pink slips. Awesome right? So we had TheBoy’s truck re-keyed and ordered the parts for the Bronco to be re-keyed. But my car? It is still in hiding. I do love American cars and will most likely ever drive anything else, however, TheBoy’s Ford was approximately ¼ of the cost to have re-keyed than my Chevy would be. And since all of our worldly good are missing AND money was tight to begin with the care remains with its old locks just waiting for someone to find her and steal her.
In the meantime I’m driving TheBoy’s Bronco. The keys to said Bronco are on TheBoy’s key chain, the key chain with the keys to the truck that he left in this morning for work while I was still scrambling to get ready (because I was still running late). Of course by the time I was finally ready for work and noticed the missing keys, TheBoy was long gone. After many calls to his cell phone which was rolling straight to voice mail, one panicked message in which I am pretty sure I sounded like I was about to cry (because I was indeed about to cry) and one-trying-to-be-funny-but-really-frustrated-as-hell text message I finally called my boss, explained the situation and sat down with some bus schedules to try and figure my way in to work via mass transit. Working backwards I had managed to find two out of three legs of a route that would get me to the office right about lunch time when TheBoy’s truck pulled in the driveway. Hallelujah!
Sadly, in my excitement that I actually had a vehicle to get to work in I forgot that 1) it was raining outside and 2) the bronco currently is operating in “topless” mode. A few weeks back when the weather was nice TheBoy took the hard top off the truck so we could drive around and enjoy the summer-like weather. Today is not so summer-like I’m afraid. After briefly contemplating whether or not I could single handedly lift the top (weighing roughly 500 pounds) back on to the truck. I think you and I both know I would be right at this minute laying under a mass of steel had I actually tried to go that route. Instead, I just went into the house, grabbed a jacket, pulled my hair into a ponytail and with a not-so silent curse started off on my 2 hour commute. I was only about an hour and a half late at this point. Sweet.
Y’all. I could go on with other this-day-is maybe-the worst-ever-and-its-only-noon stories but right now I think it is best if I sit quietly and try not to offend anyone. Actually I’m pretty much trying to avoid all contact with other humans and am silently counting the hours until I can crawl in to bed with an entire bottle of wine. I still have a two hour commute home after all and I would really like it if someone upstairs turned the rain off over in my home town. Thanks!